LIFE LESSONS

A Non-Participant Observer Enters The Holiday Season

Introverts should have secret hand signals

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I hear the low hum of conversation before I enter the room. Except for mandatory social gatherings, I am comfortable talking to people. However, the thought of cocktail chatter, as an introvert who does not drink, feels like squeaky chalk on a blackboard.

I see the Provost, who insisted I come, deep in conversation by the bookshelves. He nods. Between us are muted conversations — soft laughter, occasional murmurs, the gentle clink of glasses. How can almost everyone be talking? Is anyone listening?

I position myself perfectly — close enough to appear social, far enough to avoid extended interaction. I only know a few people at the University, and they are not here. Around me, small groups form and dissolve like gentle clouds.

Two guests near me are comparing notes about an experiment. I ask a question, and they politely explain it, then continue to talk ‘at’ each other. The background noise gets louder, and my internal battery feels depleted. I slowly walk to the bar to get a sparkling water.

I squeeze by a small group of three locked in an animated discussion about something trivial — perhaps a podcast or a recent work drama. Their…