Chapter 22 — I’m still bitter.

It’s been nearly six years, but I’m still bitter.

Me in 50 years, still bitter.

It often slips my mind, but I’ve actually been an entrepreneur from a young age. I didn’t have an official business per se, but I bought things, sold said things at a decent margin and earned money. Oh, and I had business partners too — Danny and Jordan. So I guess, we bought things, sold said things at a decent margin and earned money.

Facebook hasn’t helped me all that much in remembering when this ‘business’ existed, but it was roughly six years ago, so we’ll stick on that timeframe.

Six years ago, I was sat in my GCSE Business Studies class seriously hating on the subject. Business Studies was good for two months at the start where they let us be creative and plan some kind of business campaign. I can’t recall quite exactly what we got to do, but it was a million times better than the rest of the subject where we basically just read a book and did nothing fun. And it got even worse in Year 11.

Newsflash: Studying business isn’t all that great.

Anyway, at the end of Year 10 our teacher piqued our interest when she told us all that we had to split in to groups, come up with a business idea and, once we had one, we’d be given £50 to make that idea come to life. Suddenly, Business Studies was on the up-and-up.

I think most groups did something to do with food. You know, buy a load of ingredients, bake cakes, put on a cake sale and make some easy profit.

But myself, Danny and Jordan? We were a bit smarter than that. We identified a gap and went for it.

See, our newly formed school (more on this in a later Chapter) — Furness Academy — had no officially branded water bottles heading in to the Summer months. It was an opportunity to make literally hundreds of pounds.

Literally HUNDREDS.

So we got the £50, and found the best deal for some water bottles with the Academy logo printed on them. Then I whipped out a totally legal version of Photoshop and got to work on a poster to stick around the school.

Perfect. The font choice, the colour scheme, the owl. All perfect.

Just before the bottles arrived, the posters went up all around school. The colours I chose were a bit of an eyesore, but the posters got people talking. Then the bottles got delivered.

(I can’t find any photos on Facebook of the actual bottles themselves, so if I manage to get one from Danny or Jordan, I’ll put it right here. Until then though, enjoy this paragraph.)

And then loads of people wanted a water bottle. A lot of the staff wanted a water bottle, the PE Department bought a ton from us, and students wanted a bottle too.

We made literally hundreds.

We’d made so much more money than we expected to, and it was awesome. I think we’d made so much money that we were set to pocket about £200 each from the whole business once we’d sold the rest of our stock. Better still, any money left in the pot would go to charity. All was perfect.

And then…

And then the senior staff picked up on our success. They’d smirked at us at first, seemingly sure that no one really wanted a Furness Academy-branded water bottle.

Except they were wrong. We’d pretty much swept up, made nearly £1000 and now they were a bit annoyed that a few kids had beat them to the punch.

So they had a chat to us, and explained that they couldn’t give us all of the money we were owed because we “hadn’t actually got permission to use the Furness Academy logo on the water bottles.”

“Wait, what?”

And that was it. £200 each, gone in a flash. You’d be pretty pissed too, right?

But wait, there’s more! They still wanted to recognise how hard we’d worked and were ever so kind to offer us £50 cash and a £50 Tesco giftcard.


I don’t want to make it a habit of swearing in these Chapters, but fuck me.


So yeah, I’m still bitter.

I actually feel even more angry after writing this. I’m going to go outside for some fresh air.

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