This is What Reading Erotica Can Do For Your Sex Life

4 ways how erotica novels will impact your sexuality

Emma London
Jan 6 · 4 min read
Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say. ~~ Anais Nin

Reading brings you many benefits. It has a positive impact on your mental health and personal development.

Reading has been proved to enhance your brain function in several levels (source) and — be amazed !— this study developed by the University of Sussex concluded that reading a book for 6 minutes a day will significantly reduce your levels of stress.

The cognitive neuropsychologist, Dr David Lewis (the researcher of the study) stated, this happens because “you can escape from the worries and stresses of the everyday world and spend a while exploring the domain of the author’s imagination.” I think we can all agree with Dr Lewis’s words.

Erotica is an adult genre, and it might not be as mainstream as romance or fantasy. Nonetheless, those who read it will get some benefits above described, plus benefits for their sexual life.

Before we begin, it’s important to refer that reading erotica has, generally speaking, a different impact on women and men.

This meta-analysis review compiled 48 studies on gender differences in sexual arousal in response to sexual stimuli. Across all studies, men reported more arousal than women. This is because men are generally more responsive to visual sexual stimuli than women (source), that aremore sexually aroused by concrete, auditory, olfactory, touch and emotionally relevant sexual stimulation”. (source)

Reading erotica will have more impact on women’s arousal than for men (the same way porn has, in the reverse roles.)

How erotica sexually empowers you

For a fulfilled sex life, you need to know your sexual preferences; what turns you on, and what does nothing for you. You should invest in discovering who your Sexual Self is.

Reading erotica will help you in your process of self-discovery.

1. Increases your sexual creativity

When you watch a movie, there’s not much space for imagination — it’s all on the screen. But when you read a book, you imagine the scenarios, you must create the (hot) scenes in your mind.

Erotic books are a great way to increase your sexual creativity.

Through erotica, you will have an input of several sexual activities, like kinks, sexual dynamics, fantasies, seduction techniques, etc.

Erotica will spice your imagination and curiosity — it will make you wonder how it would feel if you tried the same as the character(s).

2. Helps you to discover your real sexual self

Reading about different sexual practises than yours might trigger your curiosity; you might consider trying what you’re reading. Or try a personalised version of it.

For example, when I read the 50 Shades of Grey book, the spanking and bondage parts amazed me. At the time I didn’t act on it, but the thought (desire) stayed with me. The scenes I created in my mind were so hot and arousing!

I knew I had found something intriguing. Years later, I (finally) walked my sexual self-discovery path, and I revealed myself as a kinkster — one that’s into BDSM. Because it took me so long to act on my sexual desires, I keep advising my readers to pursue their sexual self. Don’t waste time as I did.

Often, erotica will show you that your sexual interest stretches further more than you thought. You might have fetishes and sexual desires you weren’t aware until you read about them.

Erotica is a learning tool.

Through the characters, you will experience new sexual sensations; you will learn more about sex and about yourself. And this will push you towards a more satisfying and fulfilled sex life.

3. Improves your sexual communication

Talking about sex with your partner can be difficult, especially if you want to share a fantasy or ask to try something new.

Erotica is an excellent way of starting a conversation about your sexual desires.

You can use a part of the book to start a conversation with your partner. Use a specific scene to engage in the conversation and bring up your desires, or the topic you want to talk about.

4. Erotica spices up your sex life

In particular, with long-term relationships, it’s not unusual to routine and sex droughts to happen. Many other activities take priority over sex and intimacy, like work, kids, or house responsibilities.

With a bit of effort and devotion, it’s always possible to rekindle the flame between the couple. Reading erotica is one way you can do it.

Getting inspired by the scenes of the book and aroused by the content will increase your libido and the sexual desire for your partner.

Only by imagining the scenes, you will tease your creativity; breaking down the monotony of your sex life, and bringing some elements of the book to your bed.

Reenacting scenes of the book — or your interpretation of them — will be a sexy way to inject novelty to your relationship.

Takeaway

Erotica is an extraordinary aphrodisiac.

When reading an erotic story, you get in touch with your sexuality — with what you are and, potentially, with what you’d like to become.

By reading erotica, you will understand better your sexual needs, you will discover more about your sexual desires and fantasies.

Erotica is a precious instrument in your sexuality: partnered and individual.

Emma London writes

“Ordinary life does not interest me” — Anais Nin

Emma London

Written by

Writing on Sex & Relationships. Email me at emmafromklondon@gmail.com

Emma London writes

Stories about sex, love, relationships and Emma London’s kinks

Emma London

Written by

Writing on Sex & Relationships. Email me at emmafromklondon@gmail.com

Emma London writes

Stories about sex, love, relationships and Emma London’s kinks

Medium is an open platform where 170 million readers come to find insightful and dynamic thinking. Here, expert and undiscovered voices alike dive into the heart of any topic and bring new ideas to the surface. Learn more

Follow the writers, publications, and topics that matter to you, and you’ll see them on your homepage and in your inbox. Explore

If you have a story to tell, knowledge to share, or a perspective to offer — welcome home. It’s easy and free to post your thinking on any topic. Write on Medium

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store