From worst friend to richer relationship

Yesterday I wrote about how putting on our own oxygen masks before helping others applies to empathy. We must show ourselves grace before we can extend it to others.

Shortly after hitting publish on that post, I had a real life test.

I had a lovely chat with my best friend but didn’t realize it was her birthday until after we hung up. I’d completely forgotten. Adding insult to injury, this was her first birthday away from family and friends since relocating across the country.

I felt like the worst friend and started to berate myself. How could I not remember?? I was venting to her about my challenges instead of celebrating her. How selfish of me!

Then I remembered yesterday’s post and for a moment wished I hadn’t written it. Surely this situation was an exception.

I needed grace. I was doing the best I could as a new mom with a three-week old baby going through a growth spurt. Sleep deprivation didn’t excuse my forgetfulness, but it did help explain it.

I apologized to my friend and wished her a happy birthday. She responded with kindness and understanding and our relationship is richer because of it.