I Shall Write Neologistic Romantic War Poetry to My Fellow Festooned and Generally Castrated Fuckbois

So I guess the point is supposed to be he is ugly and doesn’t deserve love of any kind? “Don’t blame feminism, you’re just ugly!”

That sounds like a really valid argument.

And I supposed the response is supposed to say that it cannot be that he is making any valid argument because to be against feminism in any way or to critique women for romantic choices is totally and always out of bounds and evidence of deplorability and irredeemable misogyny.

Well, it is also an overtly neoliberal outlook that says all your problems are yours alone as an individual. So it’s neoliberal feminism to tell a man that all his problems are all his own and nothing to do with women while expressing an ideology that explicitly proclaims all women basically victims or potential victims of the essentially icky nature of men. Not patriarchy and systems. Men.

I still don’t recognize this feminism except from my childhood being abused as an AFAB BY women who espoused these very same attitudes and rhetoric and even sometimes the same proto- versions of the language. I never read this shit in anything, for instance, that Butler said so it irks me the implication that that is feminist too.

No wonder I have been finding more and more online feminists overtly disavowing Butler’s theories and not even for being wrong… it’s for not putting women at the absolute center of ontology itself. That her project doesn’t declare woman the base or not-base to men is her apparent sin.

I have wept that I can no longer call myself a feminist not because I am a man but because I am a man who was born in a body folded into social femininity and raised as a feminist (even if I rebelled from time to time: no worries, if I expressed any doubts about men being monsters or women being angels I would be threatened with being kicked out of the house…) to see that what most women express as feminism once you get beyond often shallow understandings of either equity or liberation, is what I got used to seeing from angry troll misogynists: just lazy projecting and calling it politics or philosophy in order to declare disagreement out of bounds.

Lookism and ableism like that portrayed in the photo above, at least, are pathological drives towards a sovereignty to control and judge others. It’s not much of an argument. I suspect if he’s a misogynist as implied, that he probably actually fundamentally shares the beliefs the supposedly feminist “comedian” has about women and men.

That’s what is so funny. The ONLY funny thing about this. The misogynist meninists and MRA’s also see men and women the same way feminists like this do: they just have different solutions.

You know what this makes me think of…

This is a Fuckboy joke without the word…

Fuckboy/Fuckboi: a man whose use-value a woman deems framed solely thru this relation to the situation of being fuckable as defined by classist, racist, homo and bi-phobic, actually misogynistic and misandrist and totally and utterly unabashedly cruel and purposeful ableistic, lookism and emotionally gaslighting condescension.

No. It’s not just for dudes who send dick pics or harass a girl for dates or sex or send lewd suggestions or call them slut or even have anything to do directly with the man expressing sexual anything towards the woman. Anymore than a man calling a woman slut often even has much to do with sex.

It’s for being a man and disagreeing with them about how they treat men and daring to say so before the woman remembers she may have a few intersectional cards to pull to shut said man up on the basis of the presumption that men are slaves to their sexuality, monsters who want to consume women, and generally feckless losers in need of salvation by women who, as the only true pure oppressed in this dialectical pathology, are the only ones owed a thing ever. That men have no loyalties, and must be led by the pussy. But of course, must earn the pussy first. And of course that is a totally unquestionable thing. And also you can’t earn it, not really, it’s like a miracle only with the will at the center containing a woman and an ideology to tell you how to be. You can’t even talk about it. That’s just more oppression.

How do I know this? I’ve never sent an unsolicited dick pic to anyone. Once a friend thought I had accidentally because I apologized for sending them a pic that wasn’t for them. They didn’t look. It was a picture of my cheap sushi lunch. I told them. They DID NOT BELIEVE ME AND STILL REFUSED TO LOOK!!! This woman later threw me away after I asked her to stop abusing me as a transman, poet, intellectual colleague and man, and carefully explained how I experienced it as gaslighting. She loves to call men fuckboys. She would never call me it to my face. But I’ve seen who else she would call that. If I were a betting man I would bet she has to herself.

I’m not an exception to the rule that Fuckboy/oi is a slur meant to invoke the threat of force within the situation. Because I’ve literally witnessed women act like it’s fine to the man’s face and then call him one on Facebook and then watched as all his friends shoved him aside without him even knowing why…

Also: I’ve been called it elsewhere and I’ve had to hear the tales of other men, cis and trans alike, quite a bit, of women pulling this card out under the implication of public shaming or worse if they didn’t shut the fuck up. It’s a popular word in liberal circles and especially college campuses and especially Portland.

Like literally your speech as a man is what is being threatened: shut up or I’ll tell everyone you’re a Fuckboy and let them think you sexually harassed me and you can suffer social isolation while I pretend you abused me and I am pure. Or, shut the fuck up because I’m gonna just relentlessly mock you like the meanest middle school mean girl and pretend microaggressions are just a thing women and certain POC get. No dick pic nor romantic implications required at the fuck all.

Also: it has ALWAYS been a DEEPLY racialized and purposefully castrating slur.

It also means: prisoner marked for death thru gang raping. The variation on spelling makes it about mocking the relationship to masculinity and implying one isn’t really masculine. It is thus a slur meant to PRIME the most toxic of what feminists call”toxic masculinity.” That means it cultivates that which it claims to mock. It lives off of the emotional panic inscribed in the masculine mind to relieve feminine panic and pretends that abuse de facto and definitionally always just oppression of women only. A Fuckboy is a cis gender conforming dude. But how many transguys and bi guys have been called fuckboi? The implication is to emphasize your LESS than actually really masculine, according to the speaker, to begin with. Think about that.

And the reference to “boy” in the first place is to make one infantile, the implication is that you are less free and human than the adult woman. Again: as related implicitly to your fuckability in a capitalist society. That is: your capitalist reproductive use-value.

The contention is not that men should not hit on women. Not even supposedly that there is a right and wrong way. The contention is KNOW YOUR PLACE BEFORE YOU SPEAK, plebe.

Fuckboy — ->gay houseboy — ->poolboy — >male house slave

People who make these jokes or think this is funny: not my friend, not my ally. And if this is your version of feminism, well: it looks more like real world misandry. Even if I’m your friend, you can’t be mine anymore than any misogynist ever was. You’re kinda not a very good friend, is all.

I found this crap on a supposedly praxis meme page on Facebook…

Praxis, indeed, IN deed.