Transgender Day of Visibility
What Was The Catalyst for Your Gender Transition?
For transgender folk, the answers are unique to the individual — and yet there are patterns.
So, What Made You Decide to Change?
As a trans woman, this is one of the most common questions I hear.
I guess one of the reasons for this is fairly valid. What would lead a person to make such a disruptive change in their life? But to ask that question shows a lack of understanding about the transgender experience.
Early on in my transition, I was sharing a quiet moment with a male friend. Looking at the sunset, he asked this question — in a tone that made it hard to tell if he was asking ME, or just musing out loud: “Why would you give up being a GUY, being a MAN? It’s like, so easier to be a man, in this culture. And why would you put yourself through all the surgeries, the social outcast thing, the intolerance? Why do that to yourself?”
I thought for a minute, trying to find the best way to answer that. Then I said, “You misunderstand. You think I’ve been a guy, all these years. And yeah, why would you give that up. But I was never a guy.” It took a bit to explain how I saw myself, how I understood myself…
