When the Bell Tolls
“Five to seven days” the postman said. My stomach turned as l released the envelope. I left the mailroom, walked to my city-ridden apartment in hopes of not vomiting on the street before I got there. I hoped they would accept him. They had already accepted the fact that we were going to get married with or without their permission or attendance hadn’t they? They had to let this one factor- that I so stupidly let slip through the cracks- go.
You know what they say, when you assume it makes an ass out of ‘u’ and ‘me’. It was Friday evening. Nick needn’t tell me my distraught mother wanted to speak with me. After all, I could hear her from our bedroom which happens to be a hallway’s length away from the kitchen where the phone resides. “You! You! Ahh! Where is Priya? Put her on the phone right now!” Hanging my head I walked to Nick and took the phone. “Hi Ma, what’s — ” “You lied to us! Not only are you marrying an American man, but you expect me to come to your wedding now? He is trash Priya Ma, and you have disgraced this family.” I felt the tears well up, but I choked them back to find some sort of explanation for my unintended destruction. Why couldn’t they get to know him? Why couldn’t they see just how wonderful a man he is and be grateful that he is caring for their daughter like no other man had? Of course they wouldn’t, how silly of me to entertain such a notion. “I’m sorry; I truly thought I’d told you until just before I left” I said. “You asked for a photo so I sent one. Yes, he is black and Ma, you’re just going to have to get over it. If you come to our wedding I’ll be ecstatic. If you don’t, I’ll still be married the following day. I love you and I hope you can find it in your heart to be here for me on one of the most important days of my life. I’ll talk to you later when we’re both calm.” I gave her no room to mouth a syllable and hung up the phone.
Nick stared at me with those dark eyes, prodding for a response though he said and asked nothing. “She’s lost her mind! You are an incredible man and she’s too damn stupid to see it or at least too stupid to want to see it…” I said sobbing. He hugged me. “Shhh, she’ll come around. They’ll come around. Let’s get some dinner, huh?”
We met two of our close friends, Steven and Susan, for dinner at Acquerello, a rustic Italian eatery on Sacramento St. We had fine wine, fantastic fattening food and enjoyed good conversation. This took an amicable edge off my salty exterior (as did my bloating belly and the six glasses of wine I’d chosen to drink). The hangover wouldn’t be my friend in the morning, but instead a nemesis; of that I was certain.
The nightmare of Ma and Nanna beating me to a pulp did no justice to my pounding head. My alarm sounded like an airplane had crashed in my bedroom window. I woke up, washed my face and smelled freshly brewed coffee, bacon and eggs. “Well, I see you made it through the night” he said with a smile shockingly similar to Alice’s Cheshire cat. “Yes, I did. Though I wish I was still sleeping and having a far better dream than I did.” He looked at me, still smiling, “I was worried you’d quit breathing on me. You were out as soon as your head hit the pillow.” “Yeah, no joke there. I’m exhausted. The family ruckus does nothing for my sanity either.” “Did you have fun last night?” he asked. “Of course I did! Anything is fun when I’m with you, honey.” He kissed me then, an element of our relationship that I looked forward to daily (even if I did have a headache the size of Texas).
Later in the day Susan and I decided to have lunch and discuss options for the wedding including: catering, colors and a playlist. My taste in music is not as eclectic as hers. I just didn’t think Godsmack was the right feel for Nick and I’s first dance as husband and wife. She disagreed, but we settled on the acoustic version of A Thousand Years by Christina Perri. Now all I had to do was worry until our big day actually arrived.
That day came sooner than anticipated. It’s my wedding day, I thought. I raced to the bathroom to shower and start getting ready. Susan arrived just in time to start my makeup and hair. We chose soft plum and mauve shadows to complement my skin tone, black liner, mascara and a nude lip gloss. My hair was curled in tendrils and wrapped in a lose bun at the crown with small jewels intertwined. I felt nervous. The dress came next. It was Ivory with a lace bodice that hung slightly off my shoulders, and form-fitting with a medium length train. “Okay, you’re ready. Turn around and look at yourself. You look incredible, Priya” she said wiping a tear from her cheek. I turned and found myself in the mirror. I felt stunning, mesmerizing; more beautiful than I had ever felt in my life. Today was the day that I would get to marry my best friend, my confidant, my lover and other half. Granted, he really had a way with pissing me off at times, but who’s counting? “Wow, thank you Susan. It’s — I love it” I stuttered. “Let’s go, he’s waiting.”
We arrived at the church and all four hundred and fifty of our closest (or Frances’s closest) friends and family were there. The photographer arrived one hour before the ceremony, just in time to shoot a few bridal shots before I became Mrs. Nicholas Collins. I heard a car pull up and peeked out the three story window. There he was, my man, dressed in a charcoal tuxedo looking as handsome as ever. I felt butterflies in the pit of my stomach. You can do this, I told myself. I started my trek down the hallway and just about face planted it when I saw my father at the bottom of the stairs, dressed and ready to walk me down the aisle. “Nanna… what are you doing here?” I choked out. I jumped at him ecstatic and close to sobbing. “You didn’t think I’d miss my only daughter’s wedding day now did you?” “But, you hate Nick! You said — “ “I said nothing of the sort. I am still getting use to this whole thing, but I love you and I want to be here for you. I’ll come around in good time” he said softly. “I love you, Nanna.” “I love you too.”
The music began to play. It was time to get married. I took Nanna’s arm just as I heard a small voice behind me, “you might need this” she said. I turned and there stood Ma, Ammamma and Nate. Ma was holding a sapphire clip. “This belonged to your Ammamma. I wore it on Nanna and I’s wedding day and now I’d like to have it.” She placed it in my hair and we hugged for what seemed like several minutes. “I can’t believe you’re here! Thank you so much for coming. I need your support because I feel like a mess” I said. “Well, you certainly don’t look like any kind of mess. Now, go. He’s waiting.”
Nick and I exchanged personal vows we’d written weeks before. We felt it would be far more personal and romantic to do it ourselves. I cried, he cried and after those fifteen minutes I was Mrs. Collins. “I now pronounce you man and wife” the preacher said. “You may kiss the bride.” My parents chose to lower their heads as seeing me intimate was already uncomfortable, but seeing me be intimate with an American black man- no contest.
Our reception was incredible. We danced; we laughed, ate food, drank an abundant amount of liquor and later listed to our friends and family toast us into forever and always. Nick rose to use the restroom “I’ll be right back baby, one too many drinks” he said with a wink. “Okay, I’ll see you in a minute. I’ll entertain everyone” I smiled and used my best flirting face. Ma, Ammamma, Nate and Nanna sat with us. They seemed to really enjoy the atmosphere, and Nate was so drunk I couldn’t tell if he was excited to see me or just excited. “You’re having a good time, huh?” “Who needs women, seriously? All I need is right here. My family and a good ‘ole bottle of… what is this anyway?” he slobbered. “That would be eighty-proof tequila, but please do continue. Just don’t make me take you in to have your stomach pumped” I laughed. Nate put his arm around me, giving me a brotherly noogie and ruining my wedding hair. “Aw, sissy you know I’ll always be good to you… most of the time.”
It had been twenty minutes since Nick had left the table. I politely excused myself and went to find him. I went to the restrooms first and there was no sign of him. Typically he gets a glass of water after taking a leak so I figured the little kitchen would be my best bet. Nope, not there either. I went back to the reception asking our friends if anyone had seen him and no one had. Interesting, I thought. He has to be around here someplace. Maybe he took the car and went to our apartment for something. I went to the lot and the car was still parked in its space. Where in the hell had he gone? “I’ll be back in a minute” was now twenty-nine minutes past its expiration. He better have a good excuse.
Finally, when thirty minutes turned into forty-five, then sixty I knew something had to be wrong. I told my parents I was going home to change so that I could be a little more comfortable for dancing and cutting the cake. They strangely understood. I got in the car and drove to our apartment. Many of the city streets were light in traffic now that it was getting to be late. Main Street Deli was closed for the evening- Nick’s favorite sandwich shop- as was any other place he may go. I parked the car, got to the door and fumbled with the keys. When I got inside nothing was different. I walked down the hallway and our bedroom door was shut. I jiggled the knob. There he was, half naked and nuzzled in bed. “Nick! What the hell are you doing? Have you lost your mind? We’ve been waiting for you!” “Priya, wait — “ “No, you wait! This is absurd. I’ve been sitting there alone with our friends and family because you said you were going to the bathroom. What in God’s name are you doing here sleeping?!” I yelled swinging my arms and wanting to tear every strand of hair out of my head. “Priya, I really think you should go…” Was he insane? Had a magic fairy came and bonked him on the head? Did he forget that we had just gotten married, and that this was our apartment? I stepped forward to give him a good slap until something caught my eye. Something blonde and naked. “Oh, uh, Priya!” I looked over and there she was. Susan…