Project #2 based off of “first” by Van Meter
Ryan and I sit in the back of my parents car. The air has a stiffness to it, and we watch the cars that trail the one I sit in. The lights tend to be too bright and harsh on my eyes; I find myself squinting. We both face away from the adults in the front, I like feeling hidden from our parents; i’m sure Ryan does as well. My stomach is heavy from the dinner we just ate, but I am satisfied. I like spending time with Ryan, he is my best friend. We will soon be home and return to our separate houses, it’s nice knowing my best friend lives next door. We are both five.
We are both around the same height. Ryan has short sandy blonde hair and always makes fun of how mine is plastered to my forehead. I try to teach him how to tie his shoes like I do; he never caught the hang of it. He’s fun to spend time with, especially since its such a short walk in between our houses. We play soccer, and sometimes watch his mothers funny dramatic shows on her television.
My dad is driving, he always seems to drive. I think it makes him feel manly and dominant; caring for the whole group of us attending dinner. It’s raining, the headlights behind us illuminate the water on the back windshield. The water falls in intricate patterns; me and Ryan watch it for a moment. The parents are focused on the static radio, I yawn, the static sound makes me sleepy. Coming to my senses my T-ball bat rolls around, I keep it still by placing my foot on it.
I do simple things with my parents. My mom will tuck me in and read to me at night. Her voice is very soothing, I like to listen to her talk as I drift to sleep. She’s always making good food and sneaking me desert as well. I love it when she calls me “Ben Ben” or “My love”; it makes me feel important to have names she thought of specifically for me. Me and my dad enjoy more masculine activities together. He helps me practice T-ball or will race me in the backyard. I like when he lifts me up into the air and mimics airplane noises. They are good parents, I feel very loved.
Ben grabbed my hand. I did not think much of it; maybe his hand was cold? Maybe he thought my hand was cold? We sat there in the back of the car; hands intertwined, feet pressed up against the inside of the trunk structure. It’s very dark in the back of the car. I like Ryan a lot, I wish we went to the same school. Our lives are very similar.
Ryan turns to me and tells me he loved me. I repeat the sentence back to him adding “too” to the end. It makes me very happy that he loves me, it’s just like when my mother says she loves me. Then Ryan asked me to marry him. I nodded my head slowly because why not? We are best friends and that would mean we get to spend time together. I was a little confused but still think it sounded like a good idea; hence the nod. We were suddenly reprimanded by Ryan’s mother, whose facial structure had gone very rigid. I did not like this. She told us boys cannot marry boys, I nodded my head slowly and turned my body away from Ryan. I felt upset, like I was in trouble.
Artist Statement- I chose to modify “first” by Van Meter because of his writing style, it flowed very smoothly in my mind. I liked the way he describes instances in childhood as if he had the mind of a adult during that time. Its interesting to have this kind of writing style for a piece referencing young children; I enjoy it because I often now think about my childhood experiences in more detail. I did have a challenge changing the POV from Ryan to Ben because I had to make up certain instances in Bens life. There is a section where Ryan talks about his relationship with his parents; I had to create up a story for Bens parents. It was a challenge thinking about it initially yet once I was able to create a vision of Ben in my head I was able to build a backstory/connection to his family. The power of point of view is important because everyone in-visions things in their own way; which is what I had to incorporate into this when switching the POV from Ryan to Ben.
