Why I Write

I have always struggled to write. Much less write essays and express my ideas on paper. It takes me a long time to gather thoughts and put them into words, carefully phrasing them in order for the reader to know what I want them to know. My time spent writing a short paragraph can range from ten minutes to two hours. The reason for this is because I am unmotivated to write most of the time. One reason why I am unmotivated and that I find great displeasure in writing is because I believe writing is subjective. It all depends on how the reader interprets the text. I will never know how my reader will react to my writing and I will never know how my reader will interpret the information I present. But I am a black and white type of person. A person who likes questions and problems that have only one correct answer. This is one of my many reasons why I am never thrilled to write because writing can go in any direction.

I find that my dislike for writing is very common among my peers. The subjective part of writing maybe my own personal issue, but many of us write to put a number on our transcript. Continuous amounts of pressure from our teachers and parents to succeed in our academics add to our stress of balancing rigorous classes and time-consuming extracurriculars. In addition, as a rising senior, I feel immense amounts of stress due to the many college application I have to complete. Thus, I rarely see a student my age write for their own pleasure.

Currently, I write to put a number on my transcript. A number that is supposed to show colleges my academic readiness and ability to succeed at their university. A number that is supposed to reflect my skills as a writer and later be compared to other students. Over my high school career, writing has not been a luxury, it has been a requirement. But I hope in the future when my admissions essays are completed, my college thesis is turned in, and other required writing assignments are done, I have improved my writing skills. But most importantly, I want to write comfortably. And by comfortably, I mean on my own free will. I will write not to recieve a grade or opinion in return. Rather, I will write about my beliefs, interests, ideas, and what is most important to me.

As of now, I am writing to be accepted into my dream university. But in the many years to come, I hope my reasons to write will be for the pure enjoyment of it.

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