How does one learn to feel legitimate when creating something new?

So, you’re starting a new project. You’ve spoken to your friends about it and you’ve got a rough plan of how to get it off the ground. But as you embark on the journey and as the scale of the issue/project/research unravels, doubts start quicking in. What if my idea is stupid? What if someone came up with a solution already? What if other people know more that I do, or have more experience in this area/industry/sector?

Last night I asked a male friend over dinner about his feelings when he started a new job or took on a new project, and whether he ever experienced that feeling of illegitimacy. His reply was simply “Oh yeah, the imposter syndrome. That’s when you’re shit at your job and you’re afraid of being found out, right?”

Well… not quite so.

Somehow, it is still hard to shake up the belief that “if you feel illegitimate to take on a new challenge, well, it’s probably because you are”. However, people affected by the imposter syndrome are often high achiever, who do not believe their own accomplishments, and have a persistent fear of being found out and exposed as a fraud. Research found that this tends to affect women adversely.

What are you bringing into the world that is so special, that you are asking people to listen and disturb the tranquility of their ordered life and behaviours?

Feeling unease and discomfort when first asserting that you are the best person to bring upon change and address an issue seems fairly reasonable. But how do you get over it?

1. Identify that fear, and put words on it

Be consciously aware of your own state of legitimacy. Are you afraid that you are not enough? Find a co-founder, a friend to bounce idea at, or even a mentor who will remind you of your strengths. Are you afraid of being wrong? You probably are, or will be at some point. We all hold beliefs which are left unchallenged until we are in a situation to confront them and realise they hold very little truth. Or is it because you are afraid to fail?

2. Take the time to write your whole argument down

Record your point, think it out loud, get your whole argument out. Then get it down to one sentence or two.

3. Is it a lack of legitimacy that you feel, or a need of validation?

When you start a new project, that feeling of illegitimacy is natural: you may have little or no experience, and taking a big leap of faith because you are eager to explore an issue or bring change by creating something new. The latest can be a powerful trigger for anxiety, and as a result can make us feel stuck and vulnerable.

3. Start doing

I love that TED talk by Amy Cuddy, a researcher, social psychologist and Professor at Harvard University. Among the many points that she makes in her talk, she shares her very own personal experience of being discharged from university at aged 19 after a very severe car accident, and being told she would never be able to go back and graduate.

After a lot of hard work she eventually graduated 4 years after her peers. But the day before her first year talk at Princeton University, she decides to call her mentor and to tell her she wants to quit. She feels like an imposter, and declares “I am not supposed to be here”. But her mentor isn’t having it. “Here is what you’re going to do: you’re gonna stay and you are gonna fake it. You’re gonna do every talk that you are ever asked to do. You just gonna do it, and do it, and do it, even if you’re terrified, and just paralysed, and having an out of body experience. Until you have that realisation “Oh my god, I am doing it, I have become this”.”

So her advice to everyone is actually to “Fake it until you become it.” Part of every new adventure is the unknown, and our creative ways to go through it not knowing what the outcome will be. Then do it over and over again until we feel like we freaking own it.

4. Get honest feedback

Most parents, relatives and friends will find your idea genius from the first moment you explain it to them. And whilst you will need their love and support in the long run, finding people with enough distance to provide constructive criticism on your project is the sweet spot you want to aim for.

“If you’re not in the arena getting your butt kicked too, I’m not interested in your feedback.”

Equally so, you will find a lot of people willing to tear your idea apart by fear of change. I like this quote by Brené Brown, as I feel that setting boundaries as to which critics you will pay attention to is so important for your well-being and mental health in the long run.

5. Build on your experience and surround yourself with happy and committed people

Sharing your experience with others and listening to their journey will help you respect your own experience. And, it is another good way to start doing by changing your focus onto helping others.

Doing a learning marathon with 9 other people is a challenge. And it could never have happened without the support, resources, planning, creativity, strategy and inspiration of its dedicated founders. But you could think that one needs to be quite selfless in deciding to multiply your effort by 10 instead of just focusing on your project.

Tim Harford, discussing his new book “Messy, The Power of Disorder to Transform Our Lives” at the RSA, argued that tasks rotation can be a powerful way to disrupt our default way of thinking and make use more creative. Multitasking has been proven to be bad on many level, including creativity. But “moving from one project to the other, and back again, is something that almost every creative and scientists has done”. This process allows mental rest to happen, as well as subcouncious processing ofideas while working on something else, and also that ideas cross-fertilize each other. In other word, when focusing on someone else’s project, you are giving your brain a rest, and allowing it to be creative to solve other problems could well be the best well to solve yours and move both projects forwards.

“If you can see any discussion as a filter for your own exploration — and every action as a channel for making your thinking visible — then the number of opportunities open to you explode.” Zahra, co-founder of Enrol Yourself

6. Don’t stop listening to your doubts

Lastly and quite conter-intuitively, don’t swich off your questioning altogether. If you are working on questioning the status quo, then having a little voice questioning your own legitimacy to act, once in awhile and on a reasonable scale, can be a powerful way to move forward and continue challenging what you think you know.