I deactivated my IG (with updates)
I deactivated my IG.
As an actress and writer in Los Angeles, IG has been my resume and contact card.
So why did I do that?
For myself. My own healing journey.
The social media is so noisy. The platform full of so many voices. I wonder if the vast strings of connections with hundreds, thousands, and millions are actually making it hard to find true genuine connection.
Esther Perel captured this sentiment in the Unlocking Us podcast about the world we live in now: “I have a thousand friends, but not a single person to feed my cat.”
Being connected on social media is the social norm, it is the depiction of social life nowadays. Being disconnected from social media = isolation.
So am I choosing healing or isolation?
True connection or Disconnection?
We will find out.
Experiment 05/06/2024 to be continued with updates…
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05/13/2024
It has been a week since I deactivated my main IG and Facebook.
- I start feeling and seeing the ordinary more clearly.
The only connection I have with in the non-physical world is texting and this Medium. I express and connect with my experience in this medium and stay connected with friends from miles away — it doesn’t matter if I’m 15 minutes away or across the country. It is an instant connection via text. When did connections become so easy, so accessible? Is it possible we do not value connections because of this convenience of such fast and vast ways to connect? Does that possibly water down the value of being able to connect with another human being?
2. I connect with people-in-contact more.
I’ve been spending time with my sister in law all day long while my brother is gone to work. I’m noticing things more acutely: her patterns, her personality, the way their house is arranged… Would I have noticed these little ‘peccadilos’ if I was constantly connected in social media? She is an amazing human being — alive, breathing, thinking, living.
I almost forgot what it is like to live free from social media connection. To be present in the ordinary. When I am present in the ordinary, I am quick to share that ordinariness in the social media instead of breathing it, owning it.
3. I am still haunted by my thoughts at night
Night is a tricky time for me. I arrange everything: what and when I eat, when I exercise, needing to shower every night, etc. in accordance with ‘sleep’. It is like a daily ritual to welcome an unwelcomed guest. Most of the things I ‘control’ has to do with ‘sleep’ because sleeping is the hardest thing for me. I cannot stop my thoughts. I realized I sleeptalk even when I am awake. Sleep and awake, dream vs reality, consciousness vs subconsciousness has very little distinction for me — almost like a blurry line, a continuum. It is a blessing and a curse — to be constantly connected to my subconscious, and to not be able to turn it off at will.
I don’t think I can continue this disconnection on social media for too long, mostly for professional reasons. But while it lasts, it is interesting…Awareness is amazing. Most of the time. Especially when it can bring improvement as a human being *it usually does. I have faith in humanity this way.
Conclusion:
Albeit a short experiment/experience, I enjoyed detaching from my main social media platform that turned professional as soon as I started acting in Los Angeles. IG is not a must for actors. Don’t get me wrong. There is no must, especially in the entertainment/film industry. Everyone has their own route for their creative endeavors and artistic journey. For example, I still hate networking parties. The smaller the group, the better — less than 5 people. And kudos for artists who are social butterflies or develop that skill. I have to drink a glass of wine before I can unnerve my semi-social phobia. (Let’s just call it nervousness).
However, I do believe that in order to cultivate creativity in life and create art that lives, instead of art that cultivates cynicism or numbness, we need to make sure that our own heart is beating, and we are living ourselves as human beings. We are humans before artists. We cannot lose sight of what is most important.
Let’s start by listening to our real intention beyond your consciousness. Our real intention might not be as pure or beautiful as we might have thought. So is people, so is life. Yet in that imperfection, our hearts are still vulnerable and beautiful. It is real. These are the things that are not so easy to see or comprehend, even about our own universes, our true heart.
Let’s start by being present. Let’s grab a cup of coffee! Don’t be afraid to contact me. I’m a real human being who wants to see your universe too :)
