Self Care During the Holidays

It’s that time of year again, where we gather together with family and friends to celebrate the holidays. The second a chill enters the air, we suddenly switch over to holiday mode. Starting in the end of the November, we have a month or so that’s meant to be geared around various festivities for the season.

While this is meant to be a happy time of the year, more often than not, it ends up being overwhelming. There’s a lot of expectations of what you’re supposed to do during this time of year. The colder weather and lack of sunlight also brings out seasonal depression in many of us as well. Also, there also can be some complicated feelings associated with spending time with family. Overall, this time of the year is just a mix of pitfalls that we need to avoid. Now, more than ever, it can be easy to forget self care. But now is when we really need it.

Here are some things I’ve picked up the last few years that have helped me with the holidays.

Online shopping

For those of you who buy presents, I highly recommend this as an option. For me, shopping in crowds makes me incredibly anxious and grumpy. I don’t like being surrounded by people so being out during this season is kinda like hell for me. So when it comes to present buying, I either shop early enough that the crowds aren’t overwhelming, or I shop online. I avoid the mall above all. That way, I take myself out of a situation that I know is going to make me miserable.

The only negative with shopping early or shopping online, is it can take a little bit more planning pending on when you do your shopping. If you usually shop last minute, it’s not gonna work as well (maybe if you have a Prime membership or are willing to shell out dough for shipping). But if shopping stresses you out, it might be better for you and your mental health to make a plan of attack so you never have to step foot in a crowded store.

Since we’re on the topic of presents…

Don’t spend money you don’t have on gifts

As long as I’ve been an adult, I’ve been struggling with money. That makes the holiday times a bit of an issue for me. As you get older, the people expect the gifts you give to be more and more extravagant, whether or not you have the income to match that. But you know what? Life is kinda hard man. There’s a lot of people that aren’t set up as well as they had hoped to be at their age. And it sucks. What sucks more is this expectation that we now can buy nice gifts for everyone if we’re still surviving mainly on ramen and mac n cheese. And as far as I can tell, that might not get easier for quite some time.

Instead of spending money I have on gifts, I’ve started being up front about my situation and what I can or can’t do. What I’ve learned is a lot of people are more than understanding as long as you explain it to them. If they don’t understand, well, then they kinda suck. But hopefully, those people who still want a top-dollar gift will be the minority, so you can still save some money. Try and set mutual gift price limits or see if there’s people who are fine not giving gifts at all. As long as everyone is on the same page, it can make everything a lot less stressful.

It’s ok to say no

This is important to remember all the time, but even more so around this time of year. Around this time, there will be a lot of different activities with friends and family that will feel mandatory. And while one or two holiday activities can be fun, there can be issues with people putting pressure on to do more than you can handle. When everyone wants you to do everything and you feel like you have to do all of it, all the sudden the fun is sucked out of these events. I know personally, that if I don’t have at least one day a week to dedicate to relax and get some alone time, I start to lose it. Too many weeks in a row without some time to myself and it usually will end with me having a breakdown, and unable to leave my apartment for a few days.

So, I started reassessing what was or wasn’t important to me. Instead of focusing on going to do activities because people wanted me to, I would think about if the activity would help or hurt my mental health. If it helps or wouldn’t change anything, fine. If it was going to stress me out, then screw it. This time of year is hard enough without overextending myself every week. If people don’t understand that I have limits that I can’t exceed, then they’re not really worth my time anyways. There might be events that are non-negotiable, or that not going will cause more issues than it would solve. But if you have the opportunity, give yourself a break. It will make you feel better in the long run.

These are some of the ways I try and keep my mental health up during this season. This time of year, there’s a lot of emphasis on giving to others. But, you can’t focusing on giving to others if your own mental health is not in a great place. Remember to be kind to yourself, and give yourself as much love as you give to others.

What are some of the ways you improve your mental health during the holidays? Let us know in the comments below!