How to Repair a Relationship with Someone You Cut Off.

If you’ve run out of glue, that is.

Don’t smile at me Sideways!

Once you’ve cut someone off it can be very difficult to bring them back into your life. It’s like divorcing someone without children or any property or shared assets or common friends. You’re out of each other’s lives. But now, for some reason, you wanna get back in there. Well, my first word of advice is don’t. I imagine you cut this person off for a reason, and since people don’t ever change, I think this is probably just a bad idea. BUT, if that’s not an option because of your life situations that have led you to believe that change IS possible, then perhaps I’m (definitely not) wrong.

In that case, I have to imagine that the person you cut off is actually a reasonable person, and you were/are not. If you are presently unreasonable, then I urge you to go back to my original suggestion: walk away, forget about it, move on, get better, find other people, fix yourself, love yourself, stop.

If it so happens that you’ve achieved the impossible, and have changed from unreasonable to reasonable, therefore deeming it time to bring good and solid people back in your life, then I suggest you go all out and go crazy. By which, of course, I mean that you should approach the other person calm and collected and simply try with an apology, explain why you’re better now, and how you would like to have them in your life again, while you understand that they may need time to regain your trust and you probably won’t be able to slide right back into whatever your relationship was before the break up/cut off.

However, if none of these cases apply to you, then I have another idea. Create a fake social media account (this will change depending on the person — some people are more trusting on FB or insta or snap). Make sure that this profile displays common interests as the other person. Also, look at your real life mutual friends and start befriending the least suspicious ones with your new account(s). Slowly, and randomly like the things that the other person posts publicly through this fake profile— you don’t want to be creepy about it, though! Then, when the moment is right (and they’re at their weakest), go in for the kill and request their connection! Now, continue to build this relationship between them and fake you — who knows what will become of this relationship? It might get romantic, it may just stay platonic, but either way, you need to keep it going until it feels right to finally come clean to Nev and Max. I know what you’re thinking, but these days, in order for them to actually pick people to film the story has to be different — interesting. So, make sure you include as many CRAZY details as you can — feel free to reference this very article. please? Once you have the camera crews in your life, I don’t have much advice, because I’ve never tried this myself. But, as the catfish you need to be sad af (and fierce? I dunno, I’m old!) so that they feel bad for you. Then you’ll finally get a chance to be face to face with the person that you cut out of your life, and you’ll finally have a chance to present your case to them. It’s very likely that they will hate you now more than they ever did before. But, I’m only giving this advice to you because I assume that you’re both unreasonable people, and I love to watch the chaos unfold on MTV’s Catfish. Also, Nev and Max.