Courage is to watch planes from the ground
How I found out what courage means to me
I’ve often felt like I’ve taken on a courage that isn’t mine. A courage that is fragile and that doesn’t come from within. A “fake it until you make it” — kind of courage. It has been so easy for me to spontaneously say yes to things, because then I simply don’t have time to think of everything that could go wrong. Like when I went to Colombia for a six months long internship by myself. That was a spontaneous decision. Or when I accepted a job in telemarketing although I hate telemarketing, just to be able to go to Barcelona.
I’ve literally jumped on planes, hoping everything will work out because I’ve been too restless to stay at one place for more than a couple of months. I’m not saying that it’s been a bad strategy, it has given me many memories and taught me countless lessons of life. Lessons about true courage, and what it means to me.
These past years, I’ve been struggling with economic uncertainty, not knowing where to live or if I should do what I do…and on top of that, existential crisis of life in general. I’ve worked my way towards exhaustion, trying to manage it all. Most often I just wanted to jump on the next plane to escape the whole situation. Only this time, I chose to watch the planes departure from the ground, trying to stay grounded myself.
To be fair I’m shit scared of flying.
After all of this I’ve realized that I kind of like the ground. By staying put, I’ve gained a bigger confidence in myself, a confidence in that I can achieve more than I thought I could, by just not giving up. It has also increased my ability to feel empathy for others, a profound empathy for those who struggle. And I dare to love more. Dare to stick around when I’m faced with feelings of uncertainty and doubt.
Being brave can mean different things to everyone, for some it is to dare to make a change, or to take a leap of faith, for others it is to open up more. For me it is to stay on the ground when I most of all want to fly away. What does courage mean to you?
This coming month our focus at Everyday School is on the theme of courage. We want to open up for dialogue and exploration of the subject and start to discover how we can be brave and courageous, even in moments when we are challenged and scared. This theme will manifest in our Instagram, Facebook, Youtube and blog. We’d love to hear your story and to take part in the conversation, you can do that by commenting on this blog post or use the hashtag #everydaycourage in social media. Remember that your words can inspire someone else to act more courageously, beautiful isn’t it?
