What to do when you’re an “average” teacher

As a teacher, I was constantly and critically aware of how “average” I was.

I loved my students, and I treasured the time I spent in the classroom. But between grading, lesson planning, teaching 30+ classes a week, and struggling to turn expectations into reality, I had a lot of days where I was exhausted and just stretched too thin.

Teachers may feel that this school year will be more challenging and exhausting than any semester before, with the extra difficulties and dynamics of in-person, online, and hybrid classes.

So as you head into the new semester and try to make it through each week, here are three strategies to help you do what you can.

1. Consider your own foundation first

As a teacher, on an average day, I could handle most challenges that came my way. I was usually able to cheerily tease stubborn students into doing the tasks at hand, or provide the extra attention that my struggling students needed.

But on days I was tired or stressed, my reaction would be more along the lines of ignoring them, telling them to ask their neighbor for help, or assigning them study hall or detention.

All teachers cognitively know that there are external reasons for poor behavior. But sometimes, when your own physical and emotional levels are drained or running low, you feel like you can’t do much.

When building a house, the foundation must completely “cure” or become solidified before it can reasonably support the walls and roof that depend on it. Similarly, it’s important that teachers are grounded in their own solid sense of safety, connection, and confidence before reasonably expecting to support the emotional needs of their students.

As teachers, we often find ourselves running on fumes and neglecting to “cure” our own foundations.

It’s certainly possible to help students learn and build confidence while you’re physically or emotionally drained — but it’s a lot easier to do after you’ve addressed your own pyramid of needs, and reinforced the foundation you must depend on to thrive.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs applies to both adults as well as kids. The ability to thrive depends on a rock-solid sense of physical health, emotional safety, interpersonal connection, and skill-based confidence.

So as you prepare to kick off this new school year, do what you can to make sure your own physical and emotional needs are met, before expecting to help your students do the same.

Helping students becomes a lot easier after you’ve addressed your own pyramid of needs and reinforced the foundation YOU depend on to thrive.

2. Take it a day at a time

As you try to connect with your students, it’s okay to start small.

• Maybe you take deep breaths throughout your classes. Or you ask students, every chance you get, to tell you about their lives and what was new that day.
• You might change essay topics to be more personal, or follow-up on your students’ competitions and performances.
• Perhaps you ask for students’ input when deciding between types of tasks. Or you help them do assignments for classes that aren’t your own.
• Maybe you stay up late, making sure each student gets at least a couple sentences’ worth of individual feedback.

All of these are valid. Any attempt we make to help build a sense of safety and connection with our students is an important step in the right direction.

The small, slow, and daily steps are sometimes the most important ways teachers can help build students’ ability to thrive and be resilient.

Any attempt we make to help build a sense of safety and connection with our students is an important step in the right direction.

3. Whatever happens, have hope

On the days you can’t even do the “small” things — when your students are uncooperative, the parents are angry, and you’re tired, and stressed, and nothing’s going right — remember you can still be compassionate.

You can remind yourself that you and your students are doing their best. That failure doesn’t happen because your students don’t care, or that you’re not “motivated” enough as a teacher. You can remember that your mistakes, just like your students’, are at the end of the day opportunities to improve and grow.

In EveryDay Strong terms, you can look at yourself and your students through a different, more humanistic lens: where you “believe that people want to succeed” and have faith and hope that “when needs are met, people can thrive.”

You can look at yourself and your students with forgiveness, and extend the benefit of the doubt. ※

Want to better help the students in your life prepare for school this fall? Download our FREE School Resilience Handbook for ideas on how to help kids thrive both at home and in the classroom — no signup required!