Draft Text of Trump’s Exit Deal
Published in
1 min readFeb 22, 2018
In exchange for leaving office
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President Trump agreed to the following
- Deletion from lists of Presidents
- No Presidential library
- A corps of uniformed admirers instead of Secret Service (on release)
- Martial wake-up music delivered by a live Bugle Corps (starting now)
- 82 24/7 video channels (inside and out)
- Mosquito free cell
- Unrecorded conjugal visits with whoever
- McDonalds on demand
- His own mattress
