My Mother Chose Her Time of Death

Emmylou Harris and Willie Nelson “Gulf Coast Highway” https://youtu.be/_03-pUBeHaM

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My mother chose her time of death

She always ran her life in her own way

It was not easy and I doubt she ever knew the

reason why

She never finished school was married still a teen

then made the world her own

She lost her hearing by degrees but ended

talking to a Queen

And when the end was coming

and for many, many years before

she was surrounded by a silent celebration

called creation

seen with eyes that could

conjure up museum pieces

in wet clay

A kiln a wheel a glaze a feel

an eye for it

an eye for it

And there she lived

on acres that seemed endless

sometimes reading

sometimes sitting there

always rising with an inner exaltation

when phoebes flew

robins bared their breasts

She survived everyone she knew

and then kept living on

And when the end came it was

on her birthday

For a week she took no food

Refused it

Lay there in no great pain

waiting waiting

The clock ticked on

She too

She had companionship

beyond all norms

Young women saw to her

They loved her

were her family

Vestals

Acolytes

The clock ticked on

I knew what was going on

She would wait until

until the year turned

Chronology was her reality

It made a difference

A birthday comes

when its year is done

If two, you are in year three

So when her final midnight came

she knew

I am she thought

I am 102

Then with a flourish she

gave up her ghost

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After

but one song gave me

the tears I felt

The same aesthetic

was at large

somehow

The song was written

in the East