OK, Calm the F*** Down. Congress is not Gonna IMPEACH Trump (Yet).
So — people seem upset by Trump’s rambling, shambolic, shit-show of a press conference. He yelled at a Jewish reporter for asking questions about anti-Semitic hate-crimes. He asked an African-American reporter to set up a meeting for him with the Congressional Black Caucus, because as you know, all African-Americans hang out together. And this morning I hear many of my friends suggesting that it’s time for Congress to Impeach our Mr. Acci-dent.
It got so bad after the Press-Conference that even FOX News, you know, that paragon of muckraking liberalism, criticized Trump. Shep Smith claimed: “It’s crazy what we’re watching every day, it’s absolutely crazy. He keeps repeating ridiculous throw away lines that are not true at all and sort of avoiding this issue of Russia as if we’re some kind of fools for asking the question.” SO — yeah. Anyone with a frontal lobe thinks the President is the Mad Pope of Vacant-Brain City. (AND Yes, do the math on that one. I’m saying that if you think he’s sane, you should consider the possibility that your frontal lobe has been removed).
Like the insane, narcissistic demagogue he is, Trump barks at anyone who disagrees with him, screams that any question that challenges his eccentric, imagined version of reality is ‘fake news,’ and when asked about the problem of hate crimes, he looks flustered and insists that he’s neither a racist nor an anti-Semite. Oh, and he also blames every problem in the world on either the Media, Barack Obama, the courts, or his ‘haters.’ In other words, Trump NEVER takes responsibility for any his actions. He is, as Bill Maher dubbed him, a pathetic, bitter, little Man-Baby.
YES, folks, POTUS is a sociopath. Yes, he is a danger to dis-empowered peoples everywhere, and he’s a threat to American interests abroad. Of course, Trump’s behavior is erratic (at best). Of course, his hour-plus rants are reminiscent of the nationalist, fear-mongering speeches of Hitler and Mussolini. Yes, his “travel ban” is racist, unconstitutional, and runs the risk of establishing a national religion. Yes, his insane approach to foreign policy frightens our shrinking list of allies, and, yes, his campaign committed treasonous acts by conspiring with Russia during the 2016 election cycle.
SO we are all beginning to ask the obvious question: WHY won’t Congress impeach him?
BUT That’s the wrong question, yo. We’re better off asking: Why would they impeach him?
I don’t believe that the current congress — run by the Republicans — will even consider impeaching Trump (not yet, anyway). Like you, I’d love to see it happen, but even following his impersonation of ‘Shaky, the Crystal-Meth Addict’ at yesterday’s press conference and the spectacular clusterfuckery that is his White(st)House(ever), I still don’t believe the Republicans will IMPEACH him. WHY? It’s simple. Republicans are far more worried about overturning women’s rights. They have to dismantle the ACA. They have a once-in-a-century chance to halt the possible demographic changes in the country by making it harder for minorities to vote and by helping state governments and courts gerrymander the shit out of the electorate. FINALLY, let’s be honest. The Republican base is full of racist hate-mongers, and the party can’t afford to piss off its base. That’s WHY.
They have too much at stake to impeach him right now. If someone found a videotape of Putin injecting heroine into Trump’s little-bitty cock, and then insisting that Mr. Acc-ident get swastika tattoos on each ass-cheek while fucking a baby bonobo, the Republicans STILL WOULDN’T Impeach him.
Sure, after they have pushed everything though, the Republicans might consider it. I have no doubt that a year or two from now, once all the immigrants have been rounded up, once a radically anti-choice, racist judge is on the Supreme Court, and once the ACA has been gutted or turned into a law that benefits insurance companies, the Republican congress might just leap to its feet and say: “That fucker Trump did all this bad shit to you! Don’t worry, American People, We’ll protect you. We need to impeach him.” Then they can look heroic — AND have Mike “The Mother Lover” Pence waiting in the wings. By that time peeps, I fear the Trump authoritarian machine will have damaged our republic more than even I — with my vivid, vulgar, part Larry Flynt, part Marvel Comics, part George Carlin brain — can imagine.
YES, Trump seems inimical to decency, to intelligence, to civility, and to peace, but, trust me, Republicans hate women, minorities, the LGBTQ community, and those in need way more than they appreciate the virtues of good leadership or intelligent economic planning. They are not a party defined by hope, planning, and wisdom.They are a party defined by what they loathe and hate. They are the party that stands in the way of change, of human decency, of prudence.
So, calm the fuck down. Congress is not gonna IMPEACH Trump (anytime soon). They might do it when it serves to help the rich, the white, and the powerful, but they won’t consider it a moment sooner.
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