Worth More Than 100 Slaps!!!
Wow!! I woke up excited because I was going to work on a draft. I said, “Yes, keep on with it!” My morning routine changed that direction! As a part of my gratitude to be alive, I spent time with two to six Medium articles every morning.
And…
This morning I read two meaningful articles. One blew my mind off! It is not the message. It is the way she delivers the message! It is stunningly blunt and kind, simultaneously. It changes the way I see and think of how I need to deliver my message — verbal and written.
Nihan Kucukural wrote, “Why You Must Murder Your Darlings.” I won’t tell you what it is about. I urged you to read what she has to say. I love the article so much; I will be biased. And, I am learning to “murder my darlings.”…
Nihan, thank you for inspiring me to write this piece. I hope you don’t mind being my muse of the day!
After the reading, this is my self-talk. It still goes on as I am writing now….
My ego is my best friend and best enemy at the same time. It nags, follows, creeps, and like some virus, it could become a pandemic. It also leads me to the most heavenly place. It all depends!!
Shoot! How am I going to start my writing now? I am aware of the existence of my “darlings.” I’ll be lying if I didn’t say I was proud of them! Kudos to me! Now, that needs to be reevaluated!
Oops!!
My ego screamed, “Why do you keep on rejecting my needs?”
What am I going to tell my ego now?
Hmmm!! I woke up feeling, “Yes!!” Now, in the afternoon, I am feeling “Maybe!!” I mean, I am writing to share a message. How do I deliver it in a way that I am wise enough to separate myself from it?…
This message is the opposite of what I’ve been taught. I need to speak and write with clarity. I can’t kill my “darlings” They are my “clarity,” my “punch lines.”…
Or maybe not?
Words are words. I chose them to be my “darlings” It has nothing to do with them….It has to do with me.
Sorry, I have to pick up this call! It’s my ego calling me….
They said, “Hello!” not in a friendly tone.
“Hello,” I answered softly, timidly, without exclamation.
“Stop thinking that you choose words. You need those words. I am the one telling you that, and I am not wrong!”
“Okay,” I replied.
At times, the best way to deal with them is to calm them down. I didn’t see myself fighting against them at this point. I don’t have the right weapons to do it. My conscience signals confusion.
At the same time, I am aware that I don't want to run away from them. Not this time! I acknowledge that I love this idea of “killing my darlings.” I am staying put! (Wow! I placed an exclamation mark!)
They see the exclamation mark. They feel it, too. They stomp! They roar!
“Are you for real??” They hung up the phone rudely!
My fingers are on the computer, typing….Unstoppably!
I am staying put, dwelling on “murdering my darlings”….
Meaning: I need to reinvent my love story. Is the word “reinvent” the right word?
Let me stop here for now.
I am biting my tongue. I had to ask my fingers, crudely, to stop writing….