Self Development is Selfless
“Help others and give something back. I guarantee you will discover that while public service improves the lives and the world around you, its greatest reward is the enrichment and new meaning it will bring your own life.”
– Arnold Schwarzenegger
I want you to take a moment and enter your memory and call back to a time when you did something for another person, but, with completely pure intentions of that person’s interests solely at heart. Are you thinking of it? Now reflect on how that made you feel. Were you feeling frustration, sadness, joy, anger…what were you feeling?
While I won’t speak for you, my personal experience always ends with a sense of fulfilment or joy. I genuinely loved doing something that would help another person when I actually endeavoured to make that my objective. I have found that having the opportunity to make someone else’s life better, whether it be in a big or small way, can be a great gift in our own lives.
The reason for this is beautifully explained by Arnold Schwarzenegger above. Serving others can not only give back to the world, but also give back to you as you learn more about your identity and purpose. It’s just as Mahatma Gandhi said, we find ourselves when we lose ourselves in the service of others. When we help others, we are put in situations where we learn about ourselves. We learn what truly makes us tick. That is why selflessness is an important component of the thing we call life.
I did an undergraduate degree in Economics & Finance. After finishing university in May 2016 I bounced around a few related roles. I quickly confirmed what I was already slowly realising during my degree, that I did not like what I was doing. It just didn’t fit me, so what did I do? I took a step back.
I had a 6 week break where I was figuring out my next steps. During this time my mentor reached out to me to ask for help with some video editing and social media management. I quickly took to the process and learned along the way. Through helping him with this task I found my connection and interest in working in digital media and marketing. I then took an upward road to learning how to work in the trade, leading to where I am today, as a digital media assistant for an incredible production company making kid’s TV shows.
But do you know the funny thing? I did not once think about this possibility when he asked for my help. My only goal was to just be of service to my mentor for all that he had done for me in the past. All I wanted to do was serve. In serving I ‘found myself’ so to speak. This isn’t an easy thing to do and I’m not sure if in any other situation I could do something solely for the well being of another without a lingering ‘what’s in it for me’ thought creeping in the back of my mind. But I am trying to.
Moving away from the primary focus of ‘me’ to ‘us’ can be a difficult task, for the mind can be restless and turbulent, and to subdue it can be more difficult than controlling the wind. But I have read that with enough practice and detachment it is possible. Detachment from the focus of just ‘me’ and a shift in our consciousness to helping others.
We just need to make a start. Because in the same way we help other people, other people will help us. Our actions will inspire them to be the same, and they will discover more about themselves just as we have. Being selfless, genuinely attentive and caring towards another person will improve the quality of our lives, our relationships, our understanding of ourselves and our place in this world. We will build our unique contribution to the world. As Madeline Bridges said, “Then give the world the best you have. And the best will come back to you.”
