Friendship Advice for a Non-Religious Person

Approach every opportunity with kindness and you’ll have a really good shot at not being demonized when they find out.

If I had a nickel for everytime a friend thought I was evil, when they found out I am an *gasp* atheist…I would have 13 cents.

Two times for sure, the 3rd was a little wonky. He shouted at me for being evil because he then felt the need to come out as an atheist himself…I have to count that one for something.

3 cents seems reasonable.

Our society is shifting. Less people are religious than in previous generations. But depending on where you are *cough* the Bible Belt of Ontario Canada, *ahem* excuse me…sometimes people are still shocked at the notion that you don’t believe that their specific god…or any god, for that matter, exists.

The current stats say that 1 in 3 Canadians are non-religious…but I think the number is higher than that. I’ve brought this up before as well, but I know for a fact that some non-believers are still in hiding. I know, cause I used to be one of them.

So, if we go with the most recent figures from 2021, 1 in 3, so 2 in 6, that means 3 in 9…34.6 in 100 (the actual percentage). If you’re looking at a church with 100 people in it, there has to be a non-zero number of pretenders in there.

Anyway, I’ve discovered if you want to have an impact on those who are religious in your friend group…you should follow a few important things:

1. Be kind, courteous and respectful

Don’t be a dick. So what, Martin thinks that he’s going to be the god of his own planet some day…treat him the way he would want to be treated, while he’s still on earth.

2. Be genuinely curious about their beliefs

Ask Martin what he’s going to do with his own planet. Imagine having your own planet! How cool would that be!?! Rhetorical question.

3. Find common ground

Talk about something else. You like video games, movies, sportsball, etc? I’m sure the reason for your friendship is well beyond whose planet will be cooler in the afterlife. Spoiler alert though, it’ll be mine!

4. Tell and show them that you care

Let them know that regardless of how they rule their afterlife planet, they are A-OKAY in your book. In fact, maybe show them how much they mean to you by treating them like another human being that is trying to figure out their place in this crazy world. I would hope they give you the same courtesy.

5. Defend them to others

If someone is talking shit about their religion or other belief system, you can assure them that regardless of how they come to conclusions, they’re a really cool person with lots of interests and talents.

6. Talk trash once in a while

Tell them that you’d have a much cooler planet in the afterlife.

7. Don’t be too serious

Which is what this story is about.

If you are friends with a religious person as a non-religious person. You both have a unique opportunity to see how the opposite side operates.

There are a few books that help with friendly dialogue and communication. One is called How to Have Impossible Conversations by Dr. Peter Boghosian.

Friendly talks can lead to more knowledge.

You might even get some good ideas of how to pimp your planet.

When the curtains close on this one.