Ten tweets about Senator Tweedle-Dee, by President Tweedle-Dumbass.

or: fortunately, the Internet shall remain forever undefeated!

Senator Rubio,

This maddening, saddening pathetic excuse of a statement should be retitled what it actually is: a repulsive, unrequited love letter, one not penned of hushed whispers, one quite loudly, nakedly screaming your very obvious, very unapologetic, very loathsome, unconditional blind loyalty to America’s Antichrist, the democratic grand experiment’s rounding error.

This nepotistic, crass, incorrigible pharaoh who constantly, impenitently, and, lest any of us forget, *very publicly* disgraced you four years ago.

Yet, I do protest some more.

This effete, nonsensical, gross soliloquy is underscored not by expected pabulum, nor what is routinely mocked as merely partisan hackery.

Upon this eminent eve, which demands extraordinary gravitas and unbiased introspection from elected public servants, your incestuous ode to the inevitable bears an even more abhorrent, ugly metastasis into the inexplicable: a spineless exoneration of the indefensible high crimes of a known traitor; maddening and saddening rationalization of The Founders’ Worst Living Nightmare; and impotent, intentional betrayal of the sacred public trust, which every patriot reading this can and does only hope, pray and wish, shall blemish, haunt, plague, shame, and vex your legacy. So too may it sound the death knell for the demise of the former* GOP forever.

Despicable.

*Yours is not the Grand Old Party of Republican history. It is anathema, cancer, scourge, bane, abomination, bete noire, public enemy number one.