Trust God While Fixing Yourself

The hard work of framing your failure in the context of His grace

Photo by nikko macaspac on Unsplash

We are human. Failure happens to all of us, and it affects us all in different ways. The secret to living our best life is not in avoiding these failures, but in how to cope with, learn from, and avoid repeating them in the future.

As people of faith, we can sometimes take failure much harder than we should. Many times, we shift the blame for these tough circumstances to God, figuring that if He were really all-knowing, all-powerful, and loving, then He wouldn’t allow us to suffer.

God never promised we wouldn’t have a tough time, however. In fact, Jesus bluntly guaranteed the opposite.

“ I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” — John 16:33

In this world, we will have tribulation. Stuff will happen. Some of it will be the fault of others, but much of it will likely be our own fault. Either way, while God has not promised us an easy life of awesomeness and nonstop winning, He has guaranteed that we can take comfort — peace — in His words. In Him. He has overcome the world, and that same power can enable us to overcome our circumstances.

But how do we really do that? Here are a few things we can do:

1. Own the things we do and say. No one is responsible for your actions or your words. If you did it or said it, it was because you decided to. No one has control over your reaction to what they do or say, just as you cannot take responsibility for their attitude or behavior. Only you can control how you respond, and only you can take responsibility if you are the cause of your own grief.
2. Forgive others. The Lord’s Prayer says it all: “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” We must forgive others if we seriously expect God to have grace toward us. We have been called to a life of integrity, and there is none in asking God for something that we don’t give ourselves.
3. Forgive ourselves. We are just as human and fallible as the people around us. We are much better at loving others if we have a healthy love for ourselves. I’m not talking about arrogance; I’m speaking to the kind of self-love that reflects the love of our Father. As we inevitably make mistakes, we have to have grace to allow ourselves to move forward positively from that place. Again, as we as God for grace in the midst of our struggles, we have to practice that same concept internally.
4. Truly learn from the mistake. Conduct an honest analysis of how it happened, why it happened, and what the impact was. Don’t dwell in the circumstances, but don’t let them pass without receiving valuable instruction from them, either.
5. Ask for help if we need it. Living a Godly life cannot happen in a vacuum. It cannot be done apart from God’s power, instruction, and correction; it cannot be done apart from His people, either. We must bring our circumstances to Him, and we must rely on each other.

Failing is not the end of the world. If it was, none of us would have made it past being toddlers. So long as we dedicate ourselves to leveraging the lessons we have learned into positive action, then we will not have gone through it for nothing.

Give your praise to God, but also give Him your concerns. Your cares. Your failures. The lessons you learn will not only make you a better person, but may also make a difference in someone else’s life.