What it means to be a man…
This last weekend I spent three days with a Men of Mariners Church Kayaking retreat on Catalina Island.
Filled with adventure, new friends, and spirtual growth, one powerful moment moved me as I watched a grown man, with the utmost strength in family and faith, cry in front of fifty men. Comfortable sharing one of the most daunting, intimate stories of losing his father — something nearly everyone will go through, some at ages too young — in that moment I understood, from him, what it means to be a man.
Being vulnerable and open with those you trust
It’s tough speaking in front of fifty men, but it’s even tougher to open up, sharing tears and intimate thoughts with those men. We find (for good reason) to abide by certain “man-rules” that society accepts, embodying the stereotype of a dominative leader, showing no weakness while keeping control of our emotions.
Crying and being vulnerable don’t reflect society’s rules of being a man. However, I’d argue that being a man means being open with the people you trust: God, your family, and your closest friends. In those moments, you strengthen your foundation and reflect your true character, building the bond with people you trust. His tears not only spoke volumes about his character, but deepened his relationship with every man listening and with God, whom he turned to in that time of need.
Using your God-given gifts to further His Kingdom
Loved by the entire congregation of guys, he built respect over the weekend because of his love and God-given talents that benefited us all. As the head chef for the weekend, he had the responsibility of preparing six meals, over the course of three days, for over fifty men, on a random beach in Catalina Island with limited resources. I can say with absolute confidence that he surpassed all expectations.
Volunteering his God given talents, he supplied the entire trip with nourishment and energy, often missing events while not serving himself until everyone was dished. Being a devout, Christian man requires using your God given talents for the benefit of others, ultimately putting them first in your life — the ultimate testament that, “Whoever wants to be a leader among you, must be your servant. (Matt. 20:26).
Living your life as a healthy, Christian role model
Being vulnerable with others and using his talents for all, he demonstrated two of the many qualities I look for in role models. This retreat showed me the greatest breed of models — Christian men. Strong in fellowship, family, faith, and character, they are everything I strive to be.
As a young adult in college, around my peers as we learn, I rarely find the presence of well-established, experienced men. This opportunity taught me a valuable lesson on having (proper) role models as we grow, aiming to live as devout, Christian models to others. My words and actions show my true character; being a man requires that character to convey a healthy, Christian model.
I watched men cry; I watched men laugh. I saw us thrive as one body in the presence of God for a weekend. In all, I saw the work of God in these men’s lives. I now see that living as a disciplined, Christian man requires being open with those you trust, using your gifts to further the kingdom of God, and living your life as a Christian role model for all to see.
