Discovering Wholeness and Rest from the Exhaustion of Living Disintegrated Lives, Part 1.
One of the main reasons there has been a continued rise in the redemptive “faith and work” movement is because of the ways we live such disintegrated lives. I am convinced that despite the death and destruction of COVID-19, we can and will walk away with new and improved life lessons - one of which is learning to live more fully integrated lives. After all, for many Americans, the work-life-home lines were greatly blurred these last ten weeks. If we can learn to dance with the newness of this blurring, however temporary, and embrace the good that can come from it long after COVID-19, I believe we will discover the wholeness and rest of more fully integrated lives.
For some, the blurring of these lines has not only been hard but downright unhealthy: increased stress in the home, more marriage and parenting tension, a lack of exercise and physical activity, working long hours with little to no breaks, a barrage of constant negative and bad news including tragic killings gone viral, and exposing challenges in areas of lives we would rather leave swept under the proverbial rugs.
And yet, some degrees of separation and division in our lives can be good and helpful. Like, leaving your home issues at home when headed to work. Not ignoring them, but not fully unveiling them either. Or, letting go of work stress when you’re on the way in the house to be with family for the evening. Again, not ignoring work completely, but balancing the art of being present with being genuine and authentic. And yes, there is an art to striking this balance. I think it is natural to have areas of our lives that naturally separate, but not if we wall off those areas keeping them from bleeding over and mixing together. On the other hand, all of us have experienced the challenge of when our “worlds collide” and areas mix in ways that cause tension or frustration.
However, I would argue overall that the division we have created for the areas of our lives has been exhausting and even destructive to entering the wholeness and rest that comes from living more fully integrated lives. The kind of wholeness and rest that Jesus promised in the good news of the gospel that offers to rescue us from our endless striving and working. To give us a true sense of freedom, purpose, identity, calling, and peace that comes from trusting Him with our whole lives; every area of our lives.
Let me allow “professor” Merriam-Webster to prove my point with the definition of disintegrate:
to break or decompose into constituent elements, parts, or small particles;
to destroy the unity or integrity;
Synonyms for “disintegrate”: break down, corrupt, decay, decompose, fester, foul, mold, molder, perish, putrefy, rot, spoil.
As you can see, unfortunately, disintegrate is a word with negative meaning for the unhealthy and destructive breaking down or separation of constituent or essential parts. And, that is exactly what I see when I look at my life and the lives of those around me: the destruction of the unity and integrity of areas of our lives that were originally intended to be fully integrated together. Areas like faith, work, play, home, and leisure.
For Christians today, this can be most vividly seen in the disintegration of our faith and work lives; what many pastors and spiritual leaders call the “Sunday-Monday divide.” This divide is a large chasm between our faith life on Sunday and our work-life that starts on Monday. And this chasm is a result of a myriad of factors of which I haven’t the time or expertise to unpack.
I can see the following negative effects this faith-and-work disintegration can have, including but not limited to…
- Believing lies about our identity and calling,
- Perpetuating myths around how faith and work are related and can co-exist,
- Dividing our whole selves and lives into separate and often unnatural categories,
- Sending mixed messages to people in our lives,
- Believing in and preaching a false gospel with our words and lives, and
- Exhaustion physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
These effects can run so deeply and subtly that we fail to recognize them. And, they reveal a foundational crack at the very core of our identity that has lasting tremors impacting the rhythms of our daily lives. I know from experience it is absolutely exhausting living such a disintegrated life and tears away at the wholeness I long for and need. It makes my chest tight, short of breath, and can leave me feeling winded.
The story continues next time in Part 2.
For now, I wanted to introduce the what and the why in Part 1 and dig more into the how and now what in Part 2. I invite you to join me for the conclusion of this story next time. What do you think? Does this resonate with you? Have you experienced this kind of disjointed, disintegrated life? What areas of your life have you seen it? How has it made you feel? What has it looked like for you? Share it with me in the comments or send me a note at faithworkstory@gmail.com.
