Why I Am No Longer Judging My Mothering
I resent the expectations, especially during a pandemic.
When asked to “write about taking care of mental health as a parent, whether you have a diagnosed mental illness or are just feeling the mental shift of balancing everything.” I remembered the last 16 months, and nearly cried. With rage.
This is a resentful, vengeful and unbalanced essay.
It is also cisgendered, heteronormative and privileged. What has been taken from mothers this year is criminal. In New York City, where I live, during Covid-19 bars seemed to be more of a priority than schools. Everywhere, the workload on mothers doubled or tripled while our incomes withered. The balance of power has never been logical in our culture, but now it is tipping into very dangerous territory. To take care of my mental health as a mother, there has to be a systemic solution.
When the pandemic created a child-care crisis, mothers became the default solution. Even as society starts to reopen, many feel forgotten and shunted to the sidelines.
— Claire Cain Miller, The Pandemic Created a Child-Care Crisis. Mothers…
