#1 -Changing The Dial

During my freshman year of high school my junior brother, Isaiah, would drive me and our neighbor, who happened to be my boyfriend at the time, to and from school every day. Sitting in his car, my seat vibrating from the blaring speakers, I would try to not think too much about the words coming at me. I knew if i did, I would get angry. Phrases like “Do your job. Lay on the bed and give me head” or “find a bag to hide the ho face” seem so blatantly sexist and demanding that you’d think they would be looked down upon by everyone. Yet, my brother would play them daily. Another song, Womp Womp by Valee, in which the main chorus is “Womp, womp, womp, womp, she give me what I wanna” implied that “womp” is all the artist hears when his love interest speaks. In his eyes however, this doesn’t matter because her words are not what he is in love with. Although, it feels wrong using the word love even sarcastically to describe the emotion in this song. I will say that these words never bothered me too much before I really thought about them. When I first started riding with Isaiah my thoughts on his music were simply “boys will be boys, what’s it to me?”. But the song that really hit me, the one that changed my viewpoint and brought out my hatred for all the others like it, is Bad Bitches Only by Migos. The words “hit it for a minute then I pass her to the homie” first brought shock, as I could not believe something so disgusting would be spoken about so openly. Then it brought anger. Anger towards Migos, anger towards society for giving him a career, anger towards my parents for making me ride in this car, and mostly anger towards my brother and boyfriend for singing along to these words as if there was no other way. I knew then and I still do that these two boys, the ones I was closest to in life, look up to the rappers they listen to. When they hear this song they imagine a rich, vibrant, respected man with girls surrounding him. They’re envious. When I hear this song I imagine an insecure, lonely, and vulnerable girl who feels completely useless of anything other than lying down and being passed around. I’m crushed. And listening to this, somehow, I too start to feel insecure and useless. Is this how guys view me? Do my thoughts or ambitions not matter? Is “womp” the only thing I’ll ever be capable of saying? Because if so, I don’t want this world, I need a new one. I don’t want this brother or this boyfriend. It’s not fair that they don’t have to feel this way. The only thing that restores my peace of mind is knowing that these rappers are not, by any means the average human male and that enjoying these songs does not mean you agree with their meaning. I think most men would be also disgusted by these lyrics or at least dismiss them as very rarely being reality. 95% of me dismisses it too. Why should I care how Migos views women? I don’t. I care that the people around me are singing with him. The words do have an effect on me and all people, as words do. All words have the power to bring out emotion or even desensitize people to certain concepts and setting those words to music only magnifies their power. I don’t want the people around me to be desensitized to a culture that dehumanizes women. I want them to feel the same passion against it as I do, but I can’t expect that from them because putting themselves in the vulnerable women’s shoes just doesn’t come as naturally as powerful man’s. The men in that car were walking into school every day feeling cool and upbeat. They had a skip in their step. I was walking in feeling angry and powerless. I felt ready to punch someone before I even walked in the building. This year, now that I drive myself to and from school, my days are different. Now I get out of my car with a skip in my step. Change the song and you’ve completely changed the emotion attached to it. My drive to school may only be ten minutes, but it went from being the worst ten minutes of my day to something I look forward to. My car is now a safe place where I feel in control. All because I changed the music.

Tear Da Club Up Thugs. “Slob on my Knob.” CrazyNDaLazDayz, track 19. Spotify, open.spotify.com/album/5ESWD1l5btKzAe9f7zGsJ2?si=VMNTqeWdQyy9gPSSzFJ0LA.

Valee. “Womp Womp.” Single. Spotify, open.spotify.com/album/7o66H14uvkdLb6dI866lOW?si=o22-zjgcSPuyCf6lx6p7cQ

Migos. “Bad Bitches Only.” Culture II, track 4. Spotify, open.spotify.com/album/7fd7SEK25VS3gJAUgSwL6y?si=UODBZAAsSouSy3zhYZCnAQ