Remember the Moms Behind Bars This Mother’s Day
By Debi Campbell
As FAMM’s Deputy Director of Family Outreach and Storytelling, I’m always telling people to share their stories. This Mother’s Day, I’d like to share mine.
I had my first daughter at 17, then another soon after that. As a single mom, I waitressed at night, scrounging every tip I got, down to the penny. We lived in California, and when I could, I would dress my girls in matching bathing suits and we’d head to the beach for a little fun.
About 10 years later, I got married and had two more girls. Things got rough, fast. My husband abused me, and a friend introduced me to methamphetamine. Soon I was hooked, and then I began selling drugs to support my addiction. This path — from using to addiction, to selling to prison — is incredibly common, by the way. And starting on that path, when I tried meth with my friend, was the biggest mistake of my life.
I ended up going to prison for 16 years as part of a conspiracy. Right away, I got sober and stayed that way. I took every parenting class I could, got my college degree, and I kept in touch with my girls as best I could. I must’ve crocheted them a hundred stuffed animals and blankets! On visiting days, we had fun, but the whole time, my girls would be looking up at the clock on the wall, knowing that time was running out on being with me.
My daughters are grown now, with kids of their own. I have 13 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. Life is good. But many nights, I lie awake and think of how different my life and my kids’ lives would have been if I’d been given a chance to show that I learned my lesson way before my 16 years. I knew very early on in prison that I would never sell drugs again. At two years, I was a changed woman. And the rest of my time? It was just me and hundreds of other women wasting our lives on 10 acres in the middle of nowhere.
This year, as you celebrate Mother’s Day, I hope you’ll think of me and all the mothers inside, many of them serving crazy-long sentences. I’ll be talking with some of them today, and I’d love to tell them how we’re rallying to change the system for them and their children. Will you join me in showing lawmakers that moms deserve a second chance?
Happy Mother’s Day, and thank you!
Debi Campbell is FAMM’s Deputy Director of Family Outreach and Storytelling.