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Are You More Likely to Meet a Narcissist on a Dating App?
The research says yes, but there are ways to date smarter
Open up any dating app, and you can sail to a magical island with infinite possibilities for finding love. Those of you from my generation most likely remember the 1964 animated TV special, “Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer,” and his journey to “The Island of Misfit Toys.” Dating apps have the whole gang from the misfit toy collection.
There’s the Charlie-in-the-Box. Surprise! He’s a raging lunatic.
There’s a boat that can’t stay afloat and the airplane that can’t fly. That’s when you discover the person you are dating is burdened with credit card debt, lives with their mother (or ex), and lacks any ambition to improve their life.
There’s the dolly for Sue. Sure, she seems normal until you uproot her insecurities and lack of self-esteem. (Why does she cry so much?)
Joking aside, I have often wondered if dating apps are an accurate sample of the general singles population. Could it be that there are more jerks/rejected toys on dating apps than in real life?
Finally, a recent study from the journal Personality and Individual Differences can shed some light on this question. A study involving 555 participants found that there are more narcissists on dating apps than people who don’t use them. They also found Machiavellianism predicted higher daily usage.
This is depressing news for single people trying to meet quality people online. Especially when the pandemic has forced many singles to socialize less in real life.
I have ignored my share of smoking guns. And most of that smoke came off of dating apps. So I hope the following clues will help you recognize the narcissist on a dating app before it is too late.
When to swipe left
They advertise status symbols on their profile.
A dating profile is like the cover of a book. If someone posts a photo of themselves standing next to a luxury car, they view their “things” as the core of their identity. Do you want to date a person or a status symbol?
