Being Anti-Misogynistic Has Nothing To Do With Helping Women
The ‘privilege’ and ‘supremacy’ is the issue, women aren’t asking for help from men
I was about to eat some bananas this morning when I popped open my dreaded twitter app, and luckily I found a really interesting tweet:
Plenty of misogynists are kind to their girlfriends, wives, and mothers. Misogyny isn’t about hating every woman, it’s about hating the ones who step out of line.
The blurry line that masks misogyny, especially in a capitalist world is financial aid. It’s super easy to misconstrue the financial benevolence of someone with genuine kindness towards you. Due to the patriarchy, women have been dealt with the wrong cards, and the game itself has been rigged since inception.
Men extending some good cards to women doesn’t exonerate them from misogyny, and until they are ready to surrender the whole deck, pay them no attention.
The discounting, objectification, and brutalization of girls and women is man’s oldest and most accepted form of oppression. Women are commodities at best and expendable at worst to misogynists. Keith Hatesputin.
Helping or being benevolent towards women was never the issue, it only seems like the issue because of patriarchy. Patriarchy has financed misogyny, misogyny has used this finances to fund benevolence, and benevolence has enticed women to stay in line.
Stepping out of line for women has always been equivalent to loosing themselves. If they choose themselves and cross the line, then the patriarchy deals with their pockets, if they remain in line, then the misogyny continues to suffocate their freewill.
Being brilliant as a woman has become arrogant behaviour, and making your own choices has to be benevolent to the fragile egos of the men that surround you. Misogyny is so ingrained in the lives of women, that simply being body positive as a woman is seen as stepping out of line. The moment you show any ounce of self love, you become a threat to everyone around you.
Yes, can we please collapse the ‘virtue’ system. Being virtuous as a woman is just another glorified way of bending to the hands of patriarchy and the benevolence of misogyny.
The commodification of women can be seen in every sentence, from the “I have a boyfriend” which shields women from harassment and the “I am not interested” which singles them out for looting. The idea that a woman must belong to another man is horrific, and any culture still enabling this deserves to be washed off from history as soon as possible.
Being anti-misogynistic as a man is so not about financial benevolence, and recognizing this soon enough would help you see much clearer. If you expect the woman in your life to only behave in ways you approve of then you’re definitely a misogynist, and no amount of benevolent sexism can exonerate you. If you still see women as lesser than you, then you have a lot of work to be done, and your public display won’t save you.
There needs to be a fine line drawn that separates kindness from benevolence. Kindness is humanistic, but benevolence is misogynistic, and sadly it’s almost impossible to distinguish between the two in a patriarchal system.
Women don’t need anyone’s benevolence, they aren’t even asking, they are powerful and can get whatever they really want on their own. What women can’t stand is a system that suffocates them into staying in a line that wasn’t drawn with their consent.
The supremacy, the ignorance, the benevolence, and the glamour on privilege as some sort of ‘charm’ needs to end, no woman wants to fit your ideal version of them, they just want to be themselves.
Women won’t apologize for choosing themselves any longer, women won’t ask for approval anymore, women don’t need your benevolence, and being anti-misogynistic was never a trophy women even cared about.
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