The Dark World of Pro-Anorexia Sites
Starving for weeks, wishing for cancer, coveting bones — when we lead privileged lives, we must self-sabotage
Trigger Warning: this article contains descriptions of disordered eating, and unhealthy eating disorder behaviors that may not be suitable for all readers. Fearless community, please read with care.
Throughout my life, I’ve had an uncomfortable relationship with food. At an early age, I learned to eat out of boredom and to avoid negative emotions.
I was the only person I knew who could eat nine full-sized Snickers bars in the space of a half-hour — with my head buried in a book and my mind transported to another world. Because I was overweight, my mother banned me from eating potato chips, fries, burgers, pizza, chocolates, and ice cream — basically everything that made life worth living. The more these treats were forbidden, the more I desired them — as is the paradox of human behavior.
I have cycled through weight extremes for most of my life.
At the age of 14, seemingly overnight, I stopped eating. I reduced my food consumption to 400 calories a day. I started working out for 2 hours every day. The weight rapidly dropped off.
