This Is Why the Narcissist Picked You
They chose you for your strengths, not your weaknesses
You’ve made it out of your relationship with the narcissist and you’re struggling to make sense of it all. Looking at it from a distance, you see it for what it was — a lie. Still, the whole thing boggles you: What happened? How did you fall for it? And, why did you stay?
You feel confused, guilty, and even stupid, so you berate yourself. On top of that, as you open up to others about your story, they drill you as well:
— How could you have let yourself be manipulated like that? You’re not a typical victim. Why were you so weak?
Guess what? You’re not—and you weren’t! You’re already struggling to forgive yourself, and the last thing you need is someone else to catechize your experience.
How do you rationalize falling victim to abuse when you don’t identify with the stereotypical idea of a victim? How do you justify to others—as well as to yourself—that ending up in a relationship like that doesn’t mean that you’re feeble and incompetent?
The narcissist picked you for your strengths
The image of the abuse-victim as meek, inept, and helpless has got to go! Your typical victim doesn’t resemble our society’s…
