Today I celebrate my second “bonus year” on this planet. Two years ago I experienced the darkest few weeks of my life, which ironically followed some of my healthiest and most active weeks.

After a few days of feeling sick, I went to Urgent Care, where they sent me to the ER and then admitted me to the hospital. The next thing I remember is waking up a couple days later in the ICU at a hospital in a different city.

While in the hospital, I got pretty sick, going into heart failure and respiratory failure, and suffering a heart attack.

I spent the first few days in a medically-induced coma, then spent the next week on life support, awake but partially-sedated. To this day, no one knows where it came from or what it was, although it was believed to be some type of virus.

For the entire week on the ventilator and feeding tube, I was pretty confident I had no chance of surviving. There were no improvements and no positive outlook from doctors. Despite all the IVs, technology, tests and constant care, I felt worse each day. Many of the conditions I was experiencing have high mortality rates, and with no certainty in the cause, there was no real plan of attack other than keeping me breathing for as long as possible.

Each day, the only good news was that I wasn’t dead yet. I couldn’t talk or sleep, so I spent hours and hours in silence, thinking, reflecting, and hallucinating, waiting for the end. It was an emotional adventure, to say the least, but I came to terms with the likely outcome.

Then, after what felt like an eternity, my body figured something out. At that point, I was a helpless mess: 20 pounds lighter, unable to perform any physical movement other than a half-assed thumbs up or thumbs down.

I couldn’t sit up, stand up, walk, eat, drink, or get to the bathroom on my own. My proudest accomplishment came after the catheter was removed and I could pee into a plastic jug — with moderate accuracy — while lying in bed, even if I couldn’t actually put the lid back on myself.

But I turned the corner, my lungs started working on their own, and the slow road to recovery began. I was incredibly lucky in that situation, and emphatically thank all the nurses, doctors, specialists, assistants, housekeepers, janitors, and everyone else who played a role, as well as all of the support from loved ones.

It’s been more than 700 days since then — days that almost never happened — and I’m grateful for every one of them. I’ve had plenty of cool experiences and have met a lot of wonderful people. Just last year, I had the opportunity to attend several weddings, including my brother and now-sister-in-law, my cousin, as well as a few of my closest friends, and attended the baptism of my new Godson.

In the weeks after getting out of the hospital, I wrote a lot about my experience and reflections. I haven’t shared many of these thoughts, so I put together a quick summary. Get a few beers in me and I can go on for hours.

It’s probably nothing you haven’t heard before, but maybe it can serve as a friendly reminder that tomorrow is not guaranteed. I never thought I’d be faced with this reality in my 20s.

Most Stuff Really Doesn’t Matter

You often hear “don’t sweat the small stuff.” The truth is: most stuff is small stuff. Almost all of our day-to-day worries. When it comes down to it, those things really don’t matter. Not that we need to walk around without a care in the world, saying and doing whatever the hell we want, but spending time stressing about how our shoes look with our outfit or whether someone at the gym is judging us is a huge waste of time and energy. I guarantee nobody cares as much as you do.

Try Not to be an Asshole

Smile. Say hello. Even if it’s forced once in a while. It’s an easy way to positively affect someone’s day.

And respect other people, even/especially if they’re different from you. These people and relationships can teach you a lot about the world and really open your mind.

Discover and Prioritize Your Priorities

Figure out what really matters to you. It might be family — children, siblings, parents, partners. It might be nature or adventure. Maybe it’s charity work and giving back to others. Spend the majority of your resources (time, money, energy) on these things.

If you truly value your car or your clothes more than anything, go ahead and spend a lot of time and money on those. But there’s a good chance they are not at the top of your list.

Your Health is Really Fucking Important

As in, nothing else matters if you don’t have your basic health. It’s the foundation to everything we do.

When we’re sick, everything is compromised. We cannot be the best version of our self, or put the most into any relationship or interaction, if our body is not functioning properly.

Take Decent Care of Yourself

As I was recovering in the hospital, the doctors told me that having a strong heart and lungs before my illness helped save my life. But don’t obsess…it’s not necessary to workout 7 days/week and eat chicken breast and broccoli all day. I sure as hell didn’t. You don’t want these things to create their own stress.

But try not to eat shit all the time. Get at least a little exercise, even walking or biking. Get your annual physical. Spend time outside in fresh air and sunshine. You may buy yourself a few more quality years with your loved ones by doing some of these simple things.

Life is Not Fair

It’s also not unfair. It’s not with you, it’s not against you. Life is life. It doesn’t always give a shit about what you want or how you feel. This was one of the harshest realities I faced at that time. Don’t complain about it. Just accept it so you aren’t so stressed when things don’t go your way…

…but You are Not Powerless

There is a lot of bullshit in this world. But there’s a lot of good stuff too. The only thing we have total control over is ourselves: how we act, how we respond, and how we treat other people and situations. If you are not happy with a certain aspect of your life, you have the power to change. We tend to spend much more energy complaining and feeling bad for ourselves than actually doing something about it.

Be Grateful

Nothing is promised to us in life. We are not entitled to anything. If you are alive and reading this today, you have a lot to be thankful for. There are plenty of people who aren’t as lucky as you. If you experience a breakup, catch a cold or jam your finger, it definitely sucks. But don’t let it break you. It’s not life-threatening. You’ll recover. You’ll be okay in the end. The same goes for most of our daily stresses: you WILL recover, you WILL be okay in the end. Be grateful for that.

Help Other People

If you’re not sick or dying, you are in a better position than a lot of people. Spend time giving back to those who need it.

Do Things You Enjoy

I believe it’s important to work hard to achieve the life you want, but also remember that you may not make it that far. Don’t spend every hour of every day working so hard that you find yourself out of time to actually enjoy the things you’ve been working towards.

Life is about balance. Work for long-term goals/happiness, but don’t forget to enjoy yourself along the way. Lying in that bed, I never once thought, “man I wish I would have done fewer cool things,” or “I wish I would have made LESS time for family and friends.”

I’m definitely not claiming I nail these things 100% of the time. I still yell at slow drivers. I get stressed and pissed off. I could certainly be more generous. But this experience, and the reflections thereafter, have helped me gain a better perspective.

We don’t need to hold on to negative thoughts and feelings so much. We should try to live in a way that doesn’t make us feel like we’re leaving a lot on the table, not leaving unfinished business. Trust me, you don’t want to be in your last moments thinking I wish I would have done that or I wish I wouldn’t have treated him/her like that.

The bottom line is that we never know when our time is up. There’s no guarantee we’ll be here tomorrow. We shouldn’t be scared of this reality, nor deny its existence. Accepting it can help us live a more meaningful life.

Anyway, these are just some of the things I thought about during that time. I don’t like people telling me how to live my life, so think of them as observations rather than rules or recommendations. If you get anything out of it, awesome. If not, that’s cool too. Just happy to be able to share them.