The faint aroma of jasmine is wafting all around the garden, it was time for a tea break. A garden filled with colorful flowers and exotic plants, a fake beauty in the middle of bustling village. Sitting within the middle were 2 person with a contrasting looks. A ruined and empty man are sitting across a lady with veil-like white hair and a striking magenta eyes. Their routine were about to begin.

The lady starts by picking up her tea, a mix of rosemary and hibiscus with a sprinkle of sugar. She shook the cup in front of her nose, to take a deep note of the scent that was there. A fresh and warm sip went through her tastebud before she started to talk at the man.

“I quite like the note on this tea, I’m suprised you could brew such an exquisite tea on your own.” The lady teased.

“…This is nothing,” He halt his voice, before letting out a sigh. “I just… remember the recipe.”

A petal falls on top of his tea, but he had no intention on picking or even looking at it. He hugs his folded legs closer to his chest, like caging a beast inside. His eyes went everywhere but towards the person in his front. Another silence befalled them, as a faint smell of lavender came.

“Cheer up a little, my doctor. Your little ‘friend’ is healthy and well, he is even working in a little pawn shop recently!” Her tone sounded too cheerful.

“I don’t really… care. I left him anyway, alone and spooked.” His hand fidgeted on his trousers. The lady can see an expression full of remorse and guilt, it was all for a past he can’t change. Well, wouldn’t is the correct words for him.

“I never thought you were this pessimistic, what happened to the doctor that was too kind back there?”

“That ‘doctor’ is long gone. I’m nothing more than a garbage now.”

“Aww, don’t low yourself like that. I know you still holds some memories tight in your chest.” The lady placed her cup and look at him, eyes winced with a grinning smile, “You can’t truly forget his face, can’t you? It lingers painfully, staining your dirty heart”

The man jerked, as the beast went rampant and hurts him more. Her words were true, and he hated it. Too much time spent on methods and experiment, just so he can forget a single fragment of their time. He wants to forget, so the beast in his chest can go away and leave him alone.

The beast was cunning, it attacks his most fragile part, his heart. Bottles of medication and crumpled papers scattered across the entire room, but the beast never falter. His head’s spinning, nauseous is the new common, and he hasn’t felt happiness since 8 years ago. Truly laughable to think all this came from reminiscing a single innocent boy’s face. The lady watched his silent answer and couldn’t help and let out a little giggle. The lady opened both his hand in a welcoming gesture, a sly smile still sitting at her face.

“As I have always said, we don’t need to rush everything. My ‘master’ is a very understanding person, but do let me reminds you again.”

“To let me possess you and end this world in a bittersweet ending unique than ever, or let this world rot slowly and make everyone suffers in a endless loop of death and reincarnation.”

“My dear doctor, you have choices. As the bearer of truth, I’m giving you a special benefits that no one can have.” Seeing that the man didn’t responded, the lady take back her hands and folded it on her thighs.

“To be frank, I have been eyeing this world since your first encounter with the child. I could smell the great scent that were brewing here, and were hoping i can devour it as soon as possible. Oh! well, that was embarrassing to say, isn’t it?”

“…” his hand clenched harder.

“Then again, patience runs deep in my vein. I wouldn’t mind to wait for another reincarnation for you to make a decision. It could be better for the both of us that way.”

Suddenly a sound ringed from the lady’s side, her end of visit’s alarm. The lady covered her face in embarrassment and hurriedly went up while fixing her bone white dress, checking whether petals has stuck in the garment or her hair. The lady gave a final parting bow and went out her way, leaving a lone man in the middle of a garden. His feeling were apparent that day.

what a disgusting freak. You and your “master”.

He throws away the sweet sugar tea onto the flower bed.

i remember rain, it was cold! i saw the wind blew all the trees and water everywhere!

sometimes nurse forgot to bring me a warmie, so i always used my arms and legs for my body. when i lay, i can hear rainwater hitting the windows, they sound like when a bed is pushed reeeeeally fast in the hall.

i enjoyed it for a while until the scream appear, it sounded so loud and deep that i really hated it. why does the sky need to scream like that? are they tired like the patients in this house too? i want to calm them, like how the doctor always calm me. he would calm me with a warm hug, a nice compliment, and a magic that would make time dissappear! first i blink, then suddenly the rain has stopped because the doctor are stopping it for me. i never knew how, but i was happy becuz he would take me to walk around the lake and its little puddle!

there is times when the rain are too heavy, and i cant sleep well. but the doctor always sit beside me and told me a story about a little lizard prince, i really liked that story becuz the doctor said that i look like the prince! i never see a lizard, there weren’t any in the building or the lake.

i wonder how would they look like in my eyes. would they resembles me, the big eyes and pointy ears? the doctor told me to not think too hard on it, but i was curious. other nurses said that the doctor was too kind, but arent everyone supposed to be kind?

I think, while the cold disturbed a defenseless child with no warmie or a story to be retelled.

I remember the rain. It was freezing.

Thunder and storms that came didn’t really bother me now, as it bring a new sense of calm. The store’s window being the protector from the heavy rainwater, sung their cries. I clenched my hand on the mug, as I looked to the murky skies above, searching for a long lost warmth. I forgot what I used to do in times like this, or with whom I spend it. I can feel a heavy feeling that sunk inside my chest, beating hard, asking to crawl out and run away. To where? maybe to his old lover that forgot him, to his past sin and blessing, to his beloved. The owner of the heart that has forgotten its core, his flame, can only sighs and look up to the gray.

My dear doctor. I want to remember you, I want to know you more than ever, I want to learn about you. Our time was limited, yet it felt boundless. Perhaps I was too naive, like a normal child, just like how you want me to be. My mind was full of flowers and crayon that I failed to notice the red under your hands that were dripping slowly. You were protecting me, in your own cruel way while thinking everything will be okay. The Selfless pricks mindset.

A sigh escaped me, the tea that is almost cold were lifted. I wonder about you, the doctor that are too kind, and how would your life be now if I didn’t exist. Would you help people still? would you explore the world? would you still be alive?

I wonder, I wonder.