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Fictions

Your best and bravest stories, mined from your imagination

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A Union Jack Tattoo Causes a Stir

4 min readApr 6, 2025

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Image: Wikimedia Commons

I’m sitting at the bar minding my own damn business when a 300-pound leprechaun stumbles over his elf shoes and nearly knocks me off my stool. Green beer sloshes out of my mug and onto the floor. St. Patrick’s Day in an Irish bar comes with hazards, and Lucky here is the least of them. I look at his green elf hat and glass eye with the shamrock for a pupil and remember arresting him about a year ago.

To be honest, calling The Blarney Stone an “Irish” bar is a bit of a stretch. The décor is more what you would find in a kitschy Italian restaurant, the walls covered with photographs of Italian celebrities ranging from Sinatra to John Gotti to Pope John XXIII. The only visible connection to Éire is a huge Irish flag above the stage and a sign behind the bar that reads: “Dogs and Englishmen Not Allowed.”

Ethnicity aside, it’s a typical college hangout with one notable exception: no dance floor. That’s only noticeable because of the number of girls trying to dance beside the tables. Each time a girl’s hips move more than they would when walking, a bouncer rushes over and stops them.

“Well good evening, my boy,” a voice says coldly from the other side of the bar. “Another beer?”

I look over and see James Donovan: bar owner, father of my new girlfriend Julia, mobster.

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Fictions
Fictions

Published in Fictions

Your best and bravest stories, mined from your imagination

Paul Combs
Paul Combs

Written by Paul Combs

Writer, bookseller, would-be roadie for the E Street Band. My ultimate goal is to make books as popular in Texas as high school football...it may take a while.

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