The Dank, the Schwag, the No Way am I Smoking That: My Burning Ears Recap
We held Burning Ears, our annual naming celebration, in San Francisco last month. The event is a time for us to look at the good, bad, and insane names in a given space or industry. I chose the cannabis industry.
The format for Burning Ears is each of us here at A Hundred Monkeys selects 10 good and 10 bad names in our selected industry or space. Then we invite our colleagues, partners, and friends to vote on the best of the best and the worst of the worst.
The votes have been cast. We’ll look at the worst offenders first then end on a high note with some of the best names in the industry.
THE BAD NAMES
I think it’s a mortal sin to have a bad name in such a cool and hyper-competitive space. It’s just a shame, really. One caveat, as you’ll see, is some of these names are so bad they begin to look like good names. More on that phenomenon in this piece by Creative Director, Eli Altman.
Here’s how the bads stacked up:
Third place: Dip N’ Dabs
Is this for kids? Is there sugar involved? Are these folks going to get sued by Dippin’ Dots? Do I need an adult?
Tied for second place: Cannavative
I bet these folks are innovating cannabis so much. Zzzz.
Tied for second place: Dank Granny
This is so bad it approaches being good but ultimately falls short because the first half of the name, Dank, is so incongruous with Granny. And not in a way that makes either cooler or more interesting. It’s just a Granny trying to be too cool and doesn’t work.
First place: Donkey Dick Ranch
OK. I like this name because it’s outrageous and I like most things that are outrageous. However, we live in a civilized world and this is just a little too much. I was a fifth grader once too.
THE GOOD NAMES
Now for the good. By no means is this list exhaustive. In fact, there are so many more great names in this industry, but here are some of the best:
Tied for third place: Garden Society
There’s something innocuous about Garden Society, like a Sunday painting club but instead of a few middle-aged folks working on their watercolors, this is a fairly buttoned-up edibles brand that might make your watercolors even better.
Tied for third place: Auntie Dolores
Started in San Francisco and named after the famous Dolores Park where edibles are often enjoyed by the locals, Auntie Dolores feels like the cool aunt who hooks you up with a little weed before Thanksgiving dinner. Thanks auntie.
Second place: Legion of Bloom
I was surprised to find out these folks are in Northern California, as to my eyes this name clearly references the Seattle Seahawks’ defensive line known as the Legion of Boom. Either way, it was a crowd favorite despite being kinda meh as their visual identity and story just don’t seem to be speaking the same language. I was imagining more high explosives and razor wire.
First place: Electric Lettuce
Naming perfection. What’s left to say, our friends at OMFGCO nailed it with Electric Lettuce. Like every good name it’s just the tip of the iceberg: there’s a cool, well thought out, and beautiful brand to be discovered once you dive into these chilly waters — 10/10.
If you’d like a full breakdown of the whole event, please give Liam Humble’s piece a read.
If you’d like some details on the soccer team category that Eli chose, please send your eyeballs here.
