Mad Libs

Become [99,999] Times as Successful as [Kanye West]

Trust me — I totally know what I’m talking about.

Photo by Xan Griffin on Unsplash

Disclaimer: This story is intended to be random and humorous. It is published in Fill in the Blanks publication, inspired by the classic game, Mad Libs. Blank words contributed by Quy Ma.

Have you ever looked at [Kanye West] and thought, man, if only I was as [stinky] as them.

I get it, dude. Me too.

Until I changed my life by following these 4 simple rules.

Start the day [tall]

1. Buy an alarm clock that [boggles] [stupendously] and set it for the crack of dawn. Not a second later.
2. When it goes off, [mimic] out of bed and immediately [butter up].
3. Brush your teeth, wash your face, put on your [sock], and [explode] the [cow].
4. Immediately do the [grumpiest] thing on your to-do list.

If you can’t do those things with frequency, you might as well call it quits now. You’re a failure and you always will be.

Use positive thinking and affirmations

I like to look in the mirror and say to myself, “[Iggy], you are the [toilet]. I…