MAD LIBS
Recipe for a Victorian-Era Love [Secret]
Sure to delight the ascetic within anyone
Disclaimer: This story is intended to be random and humorous. It is published in Fill in the Blanks publication, inspired by the classic game, Mad Libs. Blank words contributed by Damon Ferrara, Christopher Kokoski, Ashley Seaman, Shain Slepian, JM Miana, Dariuš Butkevičius, Julia Appa, Quy Ma, Elan Cassandra, Jenna Vokolek, Yve Laran, Sarah Keays, Rujenx, Amanda Clark-Rudolph, Sandra Grauschopf, and Anonymous.
Ever watched a [duchess] and wondered: What happened? Did your hand slip and [smack] fast-forward?
Nope. Indeed, the frisson is all in the [scone]. And lucky for you, I’ve reverse-engineered its [tsundere] for all to [steal].
Create [lurid] [cake] in the comfort and privacy of your own home, without revealing an inch of [knee].
All you really need for this recipe are a pair of [hungry] [lodgers], who are willing to [butter up].
Cooking Time: 12 seconds — without a [candle]
Ingredients:
1 — poorly lit [corner]
2 — visibly repressed [Americans] w/high collars
1 — chastity [coat]
1 — angle of “lovers” hands [awkwardly] grazing [bibles]
129— pinches of [lemon]
1 — teaspoon of [commendable] [school]. Not for use, of course. Just for display.
Directions:
[Obediently], heat the [apartment] to [101] degrees F.
Make sure to [retire] [Fred] in another room.
[Unabashedly], get down to business!
We all want [digits] that promise to [wallop] us in [tasty] new ways. You think [Scarlet Johansson] doesn’t do it?
It is one of the few things you can create today that will make you [stupid] glad you are alive in the chaotic present and not in the prudish past.
Bon appétit!