How to Find Allies in a World of Hate
Yesterday morning, a man opened fire with an assault rifle in a house of faith, killing 11 innocent people. In addition to bringing with him a wave of great sadness and grief, the attack by Robert Bowers on the Jewish community of Pittsburgh has also brought with it two other emotions: anger and fear.
There’s a lot to be angry about in America today. Whether you are a white nationalist or a progressive activist, the world seems to be against you. I spent the fall of 2016 face to face with this reality, as a Field Organizer for the Democratic Party in South Florida. When a woman gave me the middle finger for registering voters outside a Walmart, I knew we were in trouble.
Last week, David Brooks aptly summarized the state of extremes in the United States in his op-ed, The Rich White Civil War. Based on research by More in Common, Brooks points out that the loudest voices in American politics are the diametrically opposed sides of Progressive Activists and Devoted Conservatives. These two groups fundamentally disagree on everything. Extreme conservatives and progressives are more or less equivalent, both in their numbers within the U.S. population (6 and 8 percent, respectively), and in their extraordinary vitriol for one another.
In the wake of Saturday’s domestic terror attack, however, we cannot further fan the flames of anger that seem determined to set our country ablaze. Who, in this moment, will not just stand against hatred and bigotry, but also stand for compassion and love?
What Divides Us and What Unites Us?
Hidden Tribes, the research basis of Brooks’ op-ed, offers new insight into the American electorate. After speaking with more than 8,000 Americans, the researchers uncovered seven affinities that define the diversity of views within the United States. For each, you can see the probability of the race, age, education, and financial position of those who make up each block. Most importantly, perhaps, this research breaks from the tendency to characterize America as a nation divided in two, offering a more nuanced view of what unites and divides us.
Three statistics from this work are extraordinarily important:
First, a plurality of Americans (26%) feel political disengaged. Of these individuals, more than 40 percent earn less than $30,000 per year, and approximately one in four have gone without food or medical treatment at least somewhat often in the past year. These are people living in a state of acute deprivation who do not have time to volunteer in their community, much less vote.
Second, three in four Americans believe that reconciliation is possible. Seventy-seven percent agree with the statement “The differences between Americans are not so big that we cannot come together.” This possibility holds great promise for trans-partisan communication. Sadly, perhaps due in part to their actual distance from politics, the politically disengaged are the most likely to disagree with this statement.
Perhaps the greatest hope for America lies on either side of that political disengaged plurality. Passive Liberals and Moderates together comprise 30% of the electorate. Presently, these groups are not actively engaged or represented by either political party, and do not have a way to find common cause. Both of these groups are turned off by the ardent tribalism of today’s political discourse, either because they feel they lack the information to appropriately engage, or because they are offended by the tone of the conversation.
Faced with the tragedy of Saturday’s massacre, how can we move towards a different paradigm? Is there a world in which we trade the devastation of death for the aspiration of understanding?
A New Way to See the World
Since the end of the 2016 election, I’ve spent a great deal of time focused on reimagining politics in America. I’ve been fortunate to find allies in this mission, which has given me the opportunity to experiment with new ideas and approaches. From my own anecdotal research, I have emerged with three fundamental truths:
One: Hate cannot drive out hate. Only love can do that.
Martin Luther King Jr. said it first, and he has always been right. When we raise our fists in rage against the other, we succeed only in planting seeds of hate. We must cultivate instead the ability to hold and support those consumed with rage, at the same time that we acknowledge anger as a secondary emotion, designed to protect us from feeling the truth hidden beneath it. We can acknowledge that anger is valid, at the same time that we encourage those enraged to move through the tunnel to get to the other side. We must insist on compassion for one another as fellow humans over the vitriol of enemies on opposite sides of a civil war.
Two: If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always gotten.
Politics in America is a shape-shifting beast. It manages to appear to change at the same time it remains virtually the same. For decades, (mostly) white men have stood on proverbial soapboxes, seducing Baby Boomers with their charisma while the political machines of both Democrats and Republicans have become subsumed by the interests of large corporations. Today’s political campaigns prioritize fundraising over civic engagement, and voters increasingly feel their vote makes no difference at all. While every Progressive Activist in America is hog-wild with their insistence that every person vote, November 6, 2018 will show exactly how disengaged and discouraged the American people really are. If we actually want people to engage politically, we have to change the nature of what that means.
Three: When mistrust comes in, love goes out.
This Irish proverb summarizes the current state of existence in America. Mistrust is high and our compassion for one another as humans is low. To transcend the current hell of anger and hate, we must embrace the chance to trust each other. Overwhelmed by social media and the 24-hour news cycle, who and what we can trust is often unclear. But if we show up for one another, in-person conversations are one place where we can reconnect and remember our shared humanity.
Building the Future, One Conversation at a Time
I’m cynical about the power of the ballot to set us free this November. Special interests, especially dark money, are at work in our political system, using it against us for their own gain. And emotions on all sides are running high. We are far more likely to act based on anger than understanding. But there’s only one way to stop doing what we’ve always done, and that’s to follow the words of Buckminster Fuller:
“You never change things by fighting against the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the old model obsolete.”
— Buckminster Fuller
This Election Day, I’m undertaking an experiment that will make the existing model obsolete, and change the face of engagement in 40 communities across the United States. I’m launching a crowdfunding campaign to host Town Halls in 40 towns and cities, focused on building understanding and trust through dialogue. Handing politics back to the people isn’t just about registering more people to vote. Every community deserves the chance to co-design their shared vision for the future, and the values they want to observe on their way to get there, to elect political leaders who can deliver the future they all want.
In 2019, I’ll be hosting the Purpose Power Town Hall Tour across America to start the conversation that can help us work together to define at a local level what that future looks like. I’m counting on all of us to choose compassion over fear, to believe in love’s power to triumph over hate. The journey won’t be easy. But I know it will be worth it. I hope you’ll join me in building this bold, ambitious future together.
You can learn more at purposepower.live.
