Early 30s

My friends are having babies

Or they already have a baby or two with a vasectomy penciled in on the calendar

Tiny little likenesses

And they smile for photos just like happy families are supposed to

With captions that read “baby’s first anything” and “I’ve never been so tired and so happy in my life”

Posts dedicated to the earnest discussion of bodily fluids and the documentation of tantrums

Written with a survivalist sense of humor and tacked up all over social media

I sit back and sigh

On a couch in a living room that is nowhere near child proof

Comforted by the tumbleweeds ambling about in my womb

I love children and my friends’ sweet, squirmy little ones

But I would never want a baby like me

With my kind of crazy

This doesn’t make me sad, that’s just how it is

So here I am defining my life differently

Sleeping in and eating candy corn for dinner

Four pets that have my eyes and no need for college tuition

My life is full

I am happy to be a baby bystander