My professor caught me skating by: An ADHD “aha” moment

To their friends, Yasmeen was notorious for being a chronic procrastinator. They would wait until the last minute to visit the library and start an assignment. But somehow they always received a good grade.

That all changed during one college course.

On an episode of our ADHD Aha! podcast, Yasmeen reflected back on the moment their professor made them take a closer look at their struggles — which led them to consider being evaluated for ADHD.

Here’s Yasmeen…

When I was in my junior year of college, I had an English class that I needed to pass in order to finish up my English minor. And we had a final paper that was worth a lot of our final grade.

I knew that my usual routine of going to the library two or three hours before class to do a paper that was due the same day wasn’t going to cut it for this paper. So I tried a different approach. I spent a few days working on this paper. I worked with the English resource center, and I got feedback from my peers. And when I submitted it, I felt really proud of the work I put in.

But then I remembered my professor mentioned something in the instructions that I completely looked over for this research paper. I had made a really dire mistake — I hadn’t read the prompt properly and I missed a key point.

I essentially wrote a different type of paper than he was asking for — one that he didn’t want. And I remember sinking into my chair and starting to cry in class because I knew, even though I tried my best, I had failed.

And that, I think, was kind of a big breaking point for me.

I was an A’s and B’s student for most of my classes. I’d literally never gotten a C up until that point. And I was like, “Whoa, I don’t want to be a C student.” It was definitely real crushing.

I felt embarrassed a little bit. Like, “Am I the only one that didn’t get this? Really, nobody else?” I think also a lot of it, too, was that I skated by in a lot of classes. I didn’t always put out the best work, but I did still get back really good feedback. But when it came to this professor, he saw right through the fluff. He was the one who was able to see the cracks in my foundation a little bit.

And I think that’s what really irritated me. It brought up a lot of insecurities about my own intelligence. Was I actually smart, or was I just kind of, like, passing through to pass through? I felt a lot of emotions. That one paper moment really made me question if I was actually capable.

It was where I said, “Maybe I should really see what’s going on.” Even though I always kind of suspected that my struggles were related to ADHD. But I also had this thought that: “Well, my methods are working for me, so I’m not going to change it.”

And for a long time I didn’t.

I’m still kind of salty with that B-minus I got in that class. But to that professor, “Thanks, I guess.” It made me look a bit closer at my struggles. And I guess I needed that.