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PARENTHOOD
Free Video Games and All the Taco Bell You Can Eat
A modest proposal for deadbeat dads who are just in the way
Most dads today do more housework and childcare than men did in previous generations. Progress is good.
But by horrible coincidence, in the last month or so I’ve heard an astonishing number of young women recount their struggles with a partner who not only doesn’t want to pitch in on the traditional women’s work, but who also refuses to fill the traditional male role of breadwinning.
In each case, the young dad’s preferred way of passing time has been playing video games.
The opposite of a gold digger
Bella’s boyfriend moved in with her and never paid any rent. When she asked for help with household expenses, he reacted with exasperation: “All you care about is money!” Sensitive to the charge of being a gold digger, Bella continued paying all their living expenses herself, while Boyfriend amused himself with video games.
Then she accidentally became pregnant. Boyfriend was thrilled. But he didn’t step up as she assumed he would.
All through her pregnancy, Bella supported the household and did all the cooking and cleaning. After giving birth, she handled almost all the childcare. Boyfriend was just one more in a long list of chores for her to take care of.
She threw him out after hearing him angrily snap at the baby for being a baby. It seems the newborn’s crying irritated him when he was trying to play his game.
Locking up the toddler
Taylor is another young woman whose boyfriend preferred playing video games to taking care of their child or contributing to household expenses. Taylor’s mother told me she and her husband provided extensive financial help to the young couple because even though Taylor worked one full-time job with a weekend side hustle, they struggled.
One assumes they’d have struggled less if Boyfriend worked, but none of his jobs lasted long. One Saturday, Boyfriend called Taylor while she was working her side gig and asked her to bring home Taco Bell. His order consumed a big chunk of what she’d…
