I No Longer Have Any Attraction To Men

I touch on the sorry state of affairs between the sexes

Photo by Afif Ramdhasuma on Unsplash

My attraction to men these days is nearly nonexistent.

I’ve known for the last ten years that I experienced limited sexual attraction to men. It’s likely that I always did have limited sexual attraction to them, but I didn’t have the language to describe that experience until ten years ago when I discovered asexuality.

However, even though I came to identify as grey ace (someone who experiences sexual attraction infrequently), I still experienced romantic attraction and found various men aesthetically attractive. For instance, I still experienced crushes every now and then with some men I frequently encountered. And I’d always found such gestures as candlelight dinners and receiving flowers to be sweet and intimate.

Now? The thought of being romantically or sexually attracted to a man makes me ill.

What’s changed? Having only been on one date in the last decade, it’s given me plenty of time to focus on myself and reflect on my past relationships. I’ve also observed men from an outsider’s perspective of an anthropologist studying their development and not as someone attempting to form intimate relationships with them.