“Virgin” Used to Mean Something Different

It was once a term of power, strength, and independence

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The common understanding today of the word virgin is a person who has no sexual experience or someone who is physically chaste. Although it’s sometimes now applied to men and non-binary people, for the past several hundred years, this word has primarily been used to describe unmarried women or maidens who have never been penetrated by a man’s penis.

Relinquishing her virginity was supposed to be a gift that a woman gave her husband, and no one else. It aligned with patriarchal norms that controlled women’s sexuality, ostensibly for the purpose of ensuring paternity. Various methods were devised for verifying virginity, including hymen examinations and various mystical practices.

But, in truth, virginity is a social construct and not a physical state of being. Some women are born without hymens, and others have torn theirs during normal activities such as riding a bike or a horse. There is no medical way to test if someone is a virgin and what constitutes virginity varies from culture to culture.

In addition, penis in vagina is not the only kind of “real” sex, and “purity” has no intrinsic value outside of cultural constructs. Viewing it that way is more about men controlling women than anything else.

Proponents of purity culture are concerned with both physical and emotional purity, only allowing for two rigid, contrasting gender roles. There is a heavy emphasis on the purity of women and their responsibility to keep male counterparts from ‘stumbling.’ They are both controlled by and the gate-keepers of this concept of purity. Physical appearance is heavily monitored, with strict rules on modest dress for young women who have to be aware of their hemline, neckline and even their eyeliner, to ensure men do not look at them lustfully.
— School of Sexual Education

Not beholden to any man

Prior to the time when virgin meant sexually chaste, it was used to refer to women who were not beholden to any man, she who was “one in herself.” Goddesses like Artemis and Hestia were called virgins because they were immune to the temptations of Dionysus, and others like Ishtar and Isis because they were strong…