What Does It Mean to Be Emotionally Independent?
Emotional independence is different from having no emotional connections with other people
If the only adult relationships that are celebrated and respected are romantic ones, then none of us can truly be emotionally independent. That’s one of the arguments Professor Rachel Moran made in 2004 in an influential law review article, “How second-wave feminism forgot the single woman,” that is still resonating 17 years later. Single women were marginalized, Moran argued, by a focus on the superwoman who could “have it all” — marriage, kids, and career.
Another significant theme from Moran’s paper was the argument that activists should turn their attention to the goal of emotional independence. First-wave feminism, she noted, was about political independence. The right to vote meant that women had their own political opinions — married women weren’t “covered” by the votes of their husbands. Second-wave feminism took on economic independence. With greater opportunities in the workplace, more women could earn their own way financially.
As long as the bonds between couples, and between parents and children, are the only relationships that are truly respected, Moran maintained, women will not be emotionally independent. Instead, they will be dependent on having…
