Why Do Some Married People Neglect Their Friends?
Do couples become more insular because they are newly smitten? Because they are busy with their kids?
One of the big, stereotype-busting findings that has gotten a lot of attention over the past decade is that married people are in some important ways less socially connected than single people. Results from several national surveys, reported by Naomi Gerstel and Natalia Sarkisian, show that Americans who have always been single are more likely than currently married people to support, advise, visit, and stay in touch with their siblings and parents. They are also more likely to help, encourage, and socialize with friends and neighbors.
Research that follows the same people over time shows that couples who move in together or get married become more insular than they were before. They spend less time with their friends and they have less contact with their parents.
Is It Only Early on in Their Relationship that Romantic Couples Ignore Their Friends?
When I describe these findings to people who don’t like them, they come up with some predictable criticisms. For example, they argue that the cocooning only happens in those early months when couples are newly smitten…