Humor | Satire

A Mom of Young Children Applies to College on the Common App

Please answer each question below with a maximum of 200 characters

If I could travel anywhere, I would go to…

Sleep.

The most interesting fact I ever learned from research was…

Dads don’t hear crying babies in the middle of the night.

In addition to my major, my academic interests include…

The History of Sleep, The Science of Sleep, The Dangers of Lack of Sleep, Psychological Disorders that Arise from Poor Sleep Habits, and Sleep Deprivation as a Method of Torture.

My favorite thing about last Friday was…

Nobody threw up.

Something you might not know about me is…

My children are so loud that our neighbors are trying to get us evicted.

Because we know that diversity benefits the educational experience of all students, the University values diversity in all of its many forms. This includes racial, socio-economic, gender, geographical, and sexual orientation. In a few sentences, please describe how you have learned, grown, been inspired, or developed skills through one or more components of diversity.