Considering Having Kids? 7 Easy Ways to Simulate Parenthood Before Deciding

Michael Savio
Frazzled
Published in
4 min readMar 9, 2022

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Photo by Natalya Zaritskaya on Unsplash

Are you considering starting a family but unsure if you’re ready to become a parent? Well, worry no more, as I am here to share my 7-step program that will allow you to experience parenthood before you commit!

#1. Start ignoring your pets

Before you have kids, your pets are your babies. You take them for walks, snuggle with them, and some of us even talk to them. Once a newborn arrives at home, that all changes. Suddenly the household is under new management, and your time is spent pleasing the new boss. This often leaves pets feeling rejected or left out, which can be heartbreaking to any pet owner. By ignoring your pets now, you’ll get to experience what’s it’s like to really break your pet’s heart. Once you stare into their desperate lonely eyes, you’ll have a pretty good idea if you’re ready to replace them in your heart.

#2. Try putting diapers on local wildlife in your neighborhood

From the second your child is born, diapers become one of the most important things in your life. Unfortunately, most kids view being changed as an act of war committed against them. They scream and struggle, often trying to kick and scratch their way free like a wild animal caught in a trap. This gets more difficult the older they get, especially when they…

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Michael Savio
Frazzled

An aging Millennial and father of two alleged to be a top writer in satire. Words can be found in Frazzled, MuddyUm, and garbage cans worldwide.