Quiz: Enoch Powell’s “Rivers of Blood” Speech, or The Rivers of Blood that Spilled out of My Wife the First Time She Stood Up after Giving Birth?

“7. A direct cause of Brexit”

Jim Tatalias
Published in
2 min readMay 12, 2021


Photo by jodie covington on Unsplash
  1. There was an actual river of blood and it wasn’t a gross overstatement for nativist political gain.
  2. There was a “splash zone.”
  3. A natural part of life
  4. Set England back for generations
  5. “As I look ahead, I am filled with foreboding” applies.
  6. Fucking disgraceful
  7. A direct cause of Brexit
  8. Happened the year the Beatles released The White Album
  9. Dropped the same year as Katy Perry’s “California Gurls”
  10. The nurses rushed over right away, made her lie down and get some rest, and I’m glad they did
  11. The nurses should’ve rushed over right away, made him lie down and get some rest, and I’m imagining the world would’ve joined hands and sung “We are the World” 20 years early with Kid Michael Jackson
  12. Again, worth saying, no real blood
  13. Its orator needed to keep defensively claiming he was not a racist
  14. After this, she did not keep defensively claiming “I’m not racist” to the lactation consultant
  15. My wife got lightheaded right after
  16. A sandwich solved pretty much everything
  17. A sandwich couldn’t begin to solve the endemic anti-immigration crises this started
  18. Now that I think about it, MAYBE a broad-based Systemic Sandwich Economic Policy could begin to combat the horrible damage already done
  19. But I really don’t think so.
  20. P.S. I really like sandwiches.

Answer Key:

“Rivers of Blood” speech: 4, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 17, 18, 19
Actual rivers of blood: 1, 2, 3, 9, 10, 14, 15, 16
Both: 5, 20

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Jim Tatalias

writer, funny-writer, parent, once told a cop who just gave him a ticket to "drive safe" when saying goodbye