Humor | Parenting

How to Get Your Teen to Do That Thing You Need Them to Do

Srsly, they’re not like mind readers, you know

(Not a member? Read for free here!)

Someone’s been reading our guide! (Canva)

There’s a common parental misconception that teens never listen. Well, hang on to your granny panties because we’re here to tell you that teens do, in fact, listen.

You’re just talking wrong.

Parenting a teen is like programming a computer; they require a specific sequence of instructions to perform various tasks.

Think of this guide as a bridge, or lifeline if you will, to communicating effectively with your teen. Soon you will be proficient in selecting the correct string of prompts and well on your way to eliminating that crazy-making language barrier.

SCENARIO 1: You need your teen to bring in the mail

Don’t say: Can you check the mail?

Why this is wrong: Your teen will check, maybe, at some point.

Later, you’ll ask: Where’s the mail? They’ll look at you like you have two heads. You’ll say: I asked you to bring in the mail. They’ll say: No, you didn’t. A fight will ensue. Blood pressures will rise. We both know your middle-aged ticker can’t handle that kind of pressure.